 Poster: A snowHead
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Well, that's about it really. Pretty much covers it in the subject line. See ya 
Ok, missus says that now he's started his GCSEs, it's all very serious and he mustn't miss any schooling (looking at end of Jan, BTW). He doesn't take much time off (actually, none since the start of the year, when... we went skiing  ). He's offered to catch up, which I think he will do, no problem. In his first week back at school, the teacher said if anyone misses a week, to let them know and they can give them the work, so they don't miss out.
In my world, everything points towards going away. But at the end of the day, he's not my kid, so she gets the casting vote. The alternative is to take my daughter, who at 7 is old enough to ski, but she's not all that keen and I would have to put her in ski school as she wouldn't be able to cope with 'proper' skiing yet, which means I would be Billy no mates on the slopes 
I've tried bribing, deals, reasoning. I'd probably twist her arm behind her back if I thought it might work  Seriously though, I'm out of ideas. Heeeelp 
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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| Quote: |
But at the end of the day, he's not my kid, so she gets the casting vote
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I think this is the nub of the gist. If it were me I'd accept it and go on my own.
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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I guess she gets the casting vote. It'll be her neck on the line if school decide to fine or prosecute. I think you're on a hiding to nothing. It is an important year so I can see her point and I will no doubt be equally precious when mine get to that age
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Billy no mates is still a better option for skiing than no skiing. How about mid term
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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Bagginsum- It's not an especially important year though. The following year will be exam year, so WILL be important. Then he'll be doing his A levels, which will also be important. THEN he'll be at uni for 3 years, which will be important. THEN he will be starting work and won't be able to take time off for the first couple of years as he will want to get his career going, etc.
So, I'll wait until 2022 and try again then eh 
And the school thing won't happen. No school is going to prosecute over one week per year.
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Lads trip......just no options left etc, will have to do it!
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| 2waterford wrote: |
| Billy no mates is still a better option for skiing than no skiing. How about mid term |
Looking at a last minute deal for about £1200. These are always for 2 people. Can only just about afford a cheap last minute deal, so can't run to school holidays money.
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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faithsdaddy, Which county are you in?
If Hampshire the week end commencing 11/12th April is a school holiday week but most the rest of the country isn't so better deals to be had also a good chance of last minute deals for that week as well, which means you can follow the snow
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Take your mistress instead , don't worry there's plenty of time to find one before then
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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faithsdaddy, join one of the sH bashes
FWIW, your step son is lucky to have you as a step dad IMO. I can see both sides of this and there's no easy solution. I'm sure you've approached this from the point of view that not only is taking your step son a good and important bonding and broader, social, fun experience, but that his life education is just as important as the academic at an important stage in his development as a member of the the human race.
One week's loss of school that can be caught up (could he do coursework for an hour or two a day?) vs the emotional/personal development benefit of a week with an important role model.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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faithsdaddy, Suggest joining a SH bash, as above - never been on one becasue me and OH both ski and I've never got enough holidays from work left (or money more to the point), but those that do go on here love them, its a great way to ski and meet like minded ski pals (I'm told!)
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| faithsdaddy wrote: |
Bagginsum- It's not an especially important year though. The following year will be exam year, so WILL be important. Then he'll be doing his A levels, which will also be important. THEN he'll be at uni for 3 years, which will be important. THEN he will be starting work and won't be able to take time off for the first couple of years as he will want to get his career going, etc.
No school is going to prosecute over one week per year. |
I'm not saying that I disagree with you. I've taken my kids out of school for a week every year up until now. This year I've had to bite the bullet and book half term as our local schools ARE fining parents and some are taking it further. Personally, I think it stinks. I'm sure your stepson would catch up no problem. All I'm saying is that your wife maybe thinks it's more important than you do? A lot of kids do sit GCSE papers in Y10 rather than everything being at the end of the 5th year (Y11) as it was in my day.
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You know it makes sense.
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faithsdaddy, can't help with your dilemma - and I wouldn't push it any further. However, complaining that you'll be "Billy No Mates" is a bit pathetic. There are loads of alternatives, many of which won't cost too much. If you are under 40 (or not far above) you could do a week at a UCPA Centre with lessons (any standard, right up to Expert Scandies Off Piste). Or a Snowheads Bash. And the suggestion of an Easter trip is a good one if you want to take the lad. Don't pay school holiday prices - arrange it yourself, it's dead low season for accommodation in France. Rule 5. 
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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bagginsmum, which LEA are you with?
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Poster: A snowHead
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I'd look at somewhere like Gressoney La Trinite in half term. Limited in comparison to Meribel but more than enough for a week away and quiet. While the piste skiing is limited, Andermatt/Sedrun/Disentis will also be quiet and can be skied cheaply if you are willing to use hostel accommodation and travel by train.
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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| pam w wrote: |
| faithsdaddy, can't help with your dilemma - and I wouldn't push it any further. However, complaining that you'll be "Billy No Mates" is a bit pathetic. |
Nice 
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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faithsdaddy, T.b.h. I'm surprised at any school now agreeing to time off if kids catch up, ours don't. As above I assume that the quip about being 'Billy no mates' is a joke, pulling a child out of school to avoid needing to ski by yourself, these days, I think is an unsupportable reason for needing a child off school in term-time* during GCSE's (I'd be more sympathetic to an argument regarding the educational benefit of taking them off school, but even then these are two important years for him), and I'm with your wife in this. If your boy is starting his GCSE's then every week will count. My daughter is just starting the same year as your son. I want her to come away with me in a couple of weekend's time, but by her own decision she will stay at home with her grandparents as she sees herself having too much homework, even this early in the term, to even take a short weekend - Friday eve. to Sunday Morn. off, let alone a whole week. Instead why not look upon it as an opportunity to enjoy the best ski holiday you will ever have and *join a SH Bash.
Last edited by Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see? on Fri 12-09-14 13:01; edited 1 time in total
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If you can stretch to £1200 for the two of you and the missus really doesn't want to go nor let you take her son out of school ... Then happy days ! Pick a bash and you'll have plenty of beer tokens left over ...
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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You'll need to Register first of course.
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| Megamum wrote: |
| I want her to come away with me in a couple of weekend's time, but by her own decision she will stay at home with her grandparents as she sees herself having too much homework, even this early in the term, to even take a short weekend - Friday eve. to Sunday Morn. off, let alone a whole week. |
Wow studious is all very well but you might need a family discussion about work-life balance at some point. If it is her way of saying she'd rsther be at home near friends or studying because its her genuine interest then it's different to it being because the workload is too high.
To the Op if the kid is badgering you then you might help him make his case. Otherwise it sounds pretty selfish - go on a Sh bash instead.
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As has been mentioned before, I assume that the 'Billy no mates' comment was a joke otherwise you won't get much sympathy!
I go away with my brothers family during the Easter hols and by diy-ing it, we can manage to do it for about £400 a person (that's flights, accom, ski hire).
Even if you throw the lift pass on top, it's only £600 a head.
So it's definitely possible 
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| faithsdaddy wrote: |
| Seriously though, I'm out of ideas. Heeeelp |
Is there any reason why Christmas week, or New Year week, or half term, or Easter week 1 or Easter week 2 are impossible for a family ski holiday?
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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Most of you are overthinking this.
GCSE's aren't difficult or strenuous. There really isn't a lot of time pressure, and one lost week will make no difference to 99.999% of kids. There is plenty of spare time built in to the timetable and kids certainly don't need to be doing hours of extra work each work, outside exam time. Frankly the same is also true during A Levels and most degree courses too.
Take them skiing, unless they're really borderline pass/fail it will make absolutely no difference come exam time.
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| Megamum wrote: |
| My daughter is just starting the same year as your son. I want her to come away with me in a couple of weekend's time, but by her own decision she will stay at home with her grandparents as she sees herself having too much homework, even this early in the term, to even take a short weekend - Friday eve. to Sunday Morn. off, let alone a whole week. Instead why not look upon it as an opportunity to enjoy the best ski holiday you will ever have and *join a SH Bash. |
Unless your daugther is very unusual and really struggling at school, that is frankly wrong and pretty sad. Don't let teachers heap unneccessary pressure on her; the exams really aren't that difficult and there really isn't any time pressure to learn everything - the syllabus will be finished and covered several weeks before the exams start, leaving plenty of time to revise anything she's forgotten.
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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^^This, and the one above it.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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clarky999, You make it sound as if GCSE's are simply something you have to pass and it doesn't matter how well you pass them. It's not quite as simple as that. The difference between A*s and A's is quite enough to rule out some universities. That may seem daft, but that's the way it is.
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| Quote: |
Most of you are overthinking this.
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I agree, in terms of the "can't miss school in GCSE time" arguments. I also agree that for a child to have too much anxiety about homework etc that they don't want to go away for a weekend is sad. Kids can be too idle and unfocussed about school work, but the opposite is equally possible (and seems much more common with girls, who have that "anxious to please" thing about them.
However, lots of parents wouldn't take children on holiday in term time because they think it gives the wrong message, and gets them into bad habits. I am not one such - I always took mine out and I, in turn, always missed a couple of weeks in June (sometimes school exam weeks) because that was when my father, who was crowd-averse, always chose to take his holidays.
But if the child's mother doesn't want him to miss school, then I think that's a good enough argument, actually. The "step parent" role can be difficult - and it's great that the OP wants to take him skiing - but probably not a good argument on which to push your luck.
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You know it makes sense.
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Inasmuch as academics are v. important and I am the product of hard core and hard corps same................... In the grand scheme of things MRS. Faithsdaddy, consider the upside of the travel, change of culture, simple being part of a "once in a lifetime/making memories" experience because that accounts for so much............, making memories. MRS. Faithsdaddy..................., I've seen a lot in life. The great and not so great. I've worked hard like so many beginning in school where thankfully my LATE father and mother (you can't get them back once they're gone) had no hesitance in pulling me out of school for a week or so and experiencing life. You remember what life is, right? Perhaps not. And despite the post facto make up work, I came out alright academically, went on to the top university where I finished in the top 5%. And you know what sweetheart, it's the eternal memory of those wonderful side trips mit der family that can never be taken away.
You only live once. Especially in this day and age.
(Tip to Faithsdaddy.............. Take the Mrs. out to dinner replete with flowers...................)
ps: My three kids, today - two in university, the other about four years away are no strangers to getting yanked out of school on various trips throughout their lives by yours truly and each has done exceptionaly well academically and otherwise. As a matter of fact the little one as it were and I are off for a few days in October, not to mention late January for a week.
Last edited by You know it makes sense. on Fri 12-09-14 14:06; edited 1 time in total
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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I think the two key factors are:
1. His Mum has the final say.
2. It sounds as if the OP wants the stepson to come for the OP's benefit rather than the boy's.
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Poster: A snowHead
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| foxtrotzulu wrote: |
| clarky999, You make it sound as if GCSE's are simply something you have to pass and it doesn't matter how well you pass them. It's not quite as simple as that. The difference between A*s and A's is quite enough to rule out some universities. That may seem daft, but that's the way it is. |
Not at all, just that one week absence in Januray won't be the difference between the grades. There'll be 2-3 weeks left to revise the syllabus even before they go on exam leave; there really is plenty of time to cover/revise everything!
Though I do disagree a bit with your second point. For a couple of courses at a couple of universities that may well be true, but IME, assuming grades are at a reasonably high standard anyway, having an excellent personal statement makes much more difference than adding a few stars to those A's.
And there's no way you're going to have an excellent personal statement if all you do is work and study!!
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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This man (clarky999) speaketh sense.
Having been the 'some work, all play' type at school, I've turned out alright. I think. Between O levels and A levels, I may or may not have seen the inside of a class room for a little over 3 months in one calendar year. On the other hand, I am a pretty good snooker player. 
Too much criticsm, rather unnecessarily. faithsdaddy, if she says no, find someone else to go with. All this chat about punishment/ fines/ prosecution and ritual beheadings being on her from everyone here are dangly bits. You are together and face everything together I assume.
Edited to add: it's a week. If he hasn't worked hard all year, one week isn't going to make a difference. 10 As at GCSE are common. Good personal statements and life experiences that allow one to write one of these less so.
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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Scuse me for asking...but what about your stepson's father's view? (Assuming he is still on the scene).
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
You need to Login to know who's really who.
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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What does the boy think?
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You'll need to Register first of course.
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laundryman, he wants to go with the ski-bunnies too.
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Richard_Sideways, Be good for eastern European language learning, very educational. 
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Be good for eastern European language learning
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Written and oral?
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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Richard_Sideways, Enough already!!
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FWIW I am actually in the camp that also thinks a week away in term time shouldn't do any harm educationally esp. in before they started their exam courses, but the Gov. doesn't seem to agree. There is this edict now about not taking them out in term time or you get fined - it doesn't need another thread, there is already one running that is countless pages long. I only ever wanted a single day, but now won't take one.
However, for these GCSE years I can now see an argument to not take them out of school, they do seem to get loads of homework and I've seen the catch-up that needs to be done when they miss just one school day on a school outing let alone a whole week - clarky999, they are worked very hard at school esp. when they will be sitting some exams early (and mine is), i.e. in year 10, when they won't be given X number of weeks off to revise. However, that said I will also encourage my one that the odd weekend away enjoying herself will be OK though.
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FAQ
