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Driving to Switzerland and back - thoughts and musings

 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
#1 Do check the settings on the in-car sat nav you inherited because just suppose it is set to 'fast and motorway' then you may just end up doing three sides of a rectangle instead of the blatantly quicker way, also known as going via Geneva and not via Besancon. Possibly the sat nav has aesthetic leanings and wanted to safe me from the view of the back end of Besancon. Clue - it ain't pretty.
#2 See above and punch yourself in the face.
#3 That Sanef doofer to fly through the French Peages is brilliant and virtually no delay on the first time, which I was led to expect.
#4 Audi A6 surpringly good on diesel. Two three quarter fills got me from Switzerland to up nurth in UK. I got passed by a BMW M3 very early on and the guy pulled into the services after me 400+ miles later. He'd had two stops for petrol already.
#5 Cruise control comes in to it's own and avoiding worrying about speed cameras (touch wood) dramatically reduces the stress of driving in foreign countries or your own for that matter. I pretty much stuck to the speed limit over here on way back.
#6 French drivers fine from my POV but the Belgians appear to have right feet made of lead and cars without functioning indicator stalks.
#7 As you approach Calais it might as well be a British motorway
#8 Following on from #7 every second Brit car is a Range Rover or a Disco.
#9 At one point there was a French and an Italian car in front of me as I was overtaken by a Dutch and (inevitably) a Belgian car. So what ? Don't know, just an observation.
#10 Some very basic French can go a long way. I really should make the effort to learn more.
#11 The Swiss border guy gave me a '13' motorway vignette and not a '12' one. I was very happy about that small 'saving'.
#12 I am writing to my MP to request that the French border guy (Switzerland to France) who took a quick look in the car and waved me through be knighted.
#12.5 Next time break the journey up. It's a very loooong one drive trip.
#12.75 Thule aerothingy roof bars generate 80% less noise or whatever the figure was. Really ? God help anyone with standard bars then.

Snowchains section:

#13 My other half insisting I practice putting on snowchains prir to trip was best investment of 40 minutes (for 1 !) of swearing, getting frustrated, scratched and covered in grease and dirt of 2012.
#14 Do not be taken in by videos of demure, fur clad, near supermodels delicately putting on snowchains in 10 seconds. This is not reality, though the video may have other plus points.
#15 That close fit between your tyre and the bodywork of your car may make it look better but it makes putting snowchains on a double pig. Because it starts as a pig of a job anyway.
#16 06:35 on a Sunday morning in a dark, freezing cold car park, at approximately 1700m high in the Swiss Alps, prior to commencing trip home, may not be the best timing to remove snowchains but that little LED torch you packed just became your best friend. And those two old jackets I've kept in my boots for years, they paid me back for my loyalty even if they were abused as knee mat and dirt/grease protection.
#17 My other half buying gloves specifically to change snowchains . . . genius.

End of snowchains section (probably):

Start of own thread drift section before even posting, you can never start early enough in my opinion:

#18 Swiss electrical system. Hmmmm.
#19 Swiss queuing technique somewhere between Teutonic barging and French never look you in the eye, the next millemetre is the most important thing on the earthness.
#20 Actually it's not the nation, it's individual people. One Swiss guy told his daughter 'attention' also known as stop hitting the nice gentleman in front of you (who was on a family sledge afternoon) in the back of his boots with your skis
#20.5 One of the worst queue barges I experienced was some young, tall, English posh Verbier stereotype git prior to Tortin lift in a light green jacket with his two female friends. If you ever by any chance read this, you ignorant piece of . . .
#20.75 In general there were very few cliche English 'Verbier stereotypes'. Though the girls do seem to make spotting them easier by wearing anything as long as it has a fur collar.
#21 With apologies to my sister for blatant plagiarism. Buying a sledge in Switzerland really needs to be a decision made in conjunction with your financial advisor to fully appreciate the investment decision you are making.
#22 That spot where the Swedish girl got killed in an avalanche off Chassoure . . . I watched people skiing it after a big dump a week or so later. Early on in the trip there were no tracks up Stairway to Heaven (or presumably they'd been filled in and no one wanted to be the first Booter).
#23 After a big dump the roller coaster path across Chassoure can in fact be filled in and become a smooth conveyor belt. That was a first for me because normally it's an in-line form of trench warfare. Even after a big dump still got moguls after the first third of the slope or so.
#24 Plan du Fou was steep, icy and mogulled when opened but then it usually is, however, the piste after it . . . I suppose the choice between glorified ice and glorified ice with death cookies thrown in for fun made the run even more interesting.
#25 When it's someone else's child skiing slowly doing near full slope traverses, it's a nuisance but not so much of an issue. When it's your own you a ready to kill every kamikaze ski jockey on the slope (and it was invariably skiers not boarders).
#26 Gentiane. Great run and with fresh snow, a bit of everything thrown in.
#27 More American accents than expected. Swiss international schools (?)
#28 If you are going to use an avalanche spade to clear the snow off your car, think about the paintwork first.
#29 Saw my second ever Swiss 'mad community band' thing with their interpretation of various tunes. What's that all about then ? Any one know ?
#30 The Tipi at this time of year doesn't get the sun later on. Makes an apres ski beer a whole different prospect.
#31 One ride on the 'slow' chair out of Chaux is enough for a lifetime. But that is intrinsic as by the time you get off a lifetime will have indeed passed.
#32 I surpassed even my own record for having a fall or rather a crash in a daft place when not paying attention. The direct path from Attelas over to Chaux, you know it ? Yes the perfectly flat, straight path. I bet you didn't know on a previous trip I skied over the edge in white out conditions and managed to recover it and ski back on to it. Hurrah. Well this time in great vis and blue skies I somehow managed to spectacularly crash in to the snowbank on the left. Even as it was happening I remember thinking how did you get into this mess and this is not going to end well. Thank heaven for the snow bank at that point because a lot of the time it's just cliff. Emerging from said snow bank and eating humble pie as some three week skier helped me retrive gear. Tres embarrassment. Friends started calling it Nick's path. It helps with navigation but it's going to get embarrassing telling people why we call it that.

Lunch time . . .


Last edited by Poster: A snowHead on Tue 8-01-13 12:40; edited 1 time in total
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Nickski, nice post. In relation to #29, that'll be a Guggen band. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guggenmusik More normally seen around Carnivale.
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
#6 is true. Nose-Tail chocka in all 3 lanes on the E40 Gent-Brussels, and all 3 lanes will be doing the 120 kph limit. That one's interesting rejoining from Wetteren services, because the acceleration lane ends with armco!

#20.5 the worst queueing I've experienced was all British Evil or Very Mad (except for the French teenage snowboarders, but they are not there to queue, but merely to show of how hard they are now that they have learned to smoke).
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#12. We went through the Vallorbe border yesterday and got stopped. The guard asked, do you speak French, replied 'a bit' and then he rattled of a question that I vaguely understood but could'nt quite get. Obviously not responding to his question he then asked the expected, where have you been, where are you going and have you anything to declare and off we went on our way. My son and myself between us then concluded that the guards original question was ' Do you know the famous French chef Michel Roux' and that he was obviously taking the proverbial p*ss
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Nickski, the run though the middle of Besacon (and that tunnel) always worked out quicker for us! You missed out smashing your watch whilst fitting chains however Laughing
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You'll need to Register first of course.
Quote:

#6 French drivers fine from my POV but the Belgians appear to have right feet made of lead and cars without functioning indicator stalks.

completely agree - drove to Zurich and back last year (not in one go, we did stop there) and the Belgian drivers were by a long kilometre the worst on the continent. I feel justified in pointing this out as we did touch 5 countries excl UK.
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 Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Re 12.75 I thought about replacing my standard bars with Aero, but never noticed the wind noise above Harry Potter audio CDs!

I'm glad that my Disco will blend in nicely on the run back up to Calais
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
Nickski, Thoroughly enjoyed that review thank you for putting a smile on my face.
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 You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
^ ^ +1
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 Ski the Net with snowHeads
Ski the Net with snowHeads
Fattes13, +1 Very Happy
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 snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
Oh bug9er +2!
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 And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
Addition to # 1
Get a new satnav that knows about the Besancon bypass, and avoid th back end entirely AND save 10 mins into the bargain!
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 So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
Second ammendment to #1:

If you have a sat-nav concern, just turn off Sat Nav, absolutely no need.
Just follow the (very obvious signs)
Besancon
Pontarlier
Lausanne

You will stay to the main roads and onto the swiss motorway.
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 You know it makes sense.
You know it makes sense.
Excellent read as always fella. I will even excuse the horrendous use of OF at the end of #31 wink
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 Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Agree with rungsp, I don't use a satnav because (shock horror) I know the way, took my son's girlfriend with us last year and she was amazed we didn't use satnav, seemed inccapable of understanding that is possible to remember the way to somewhere. Are people losing this ability?

Interesting, and amusing, musings. I also agree that "trial fitting" of snowchains is essential, preferably in the dark and the rain - I'm not kidding. A pair of gloves (cotton, not rubber which will tear instantly) and a head torch are also useful here Very Happy
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 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
Frosty the Snowman, Nah, that bit completely ruined it for me.
Nickski, You don't make many posts... No, that's all wink
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
martinperry, rungsp, Guys, you have it all wrong! It is imperative to go along the river through the grotty bit into Besancon and through the tunnel. Avoid the new road at all cost.

Then turn right out of the tunnel and stop at the bakers on the right next to the motorbike shop just before you head through the arch and up the hill out of Besancon. Great bread of many kinds, cake, quiches and superb pizza slices. Its our regular lunch spot after having overnighted somewhere in the Reims- Troyes area!
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
sanman, I know the way, but find Sat Nav quite useful to give me an idea of ETA at overnight hotels and other rest stops I've added to faves
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#27 rules for cheap corporation tax qualification have been tightening, therefore the place has been flooding with Johnny Foreigners for a few years now (to show that the company is being "substantially run" from the tax zone).
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
DJL, know exactly the baker's you mean, that is our one regret about the new road. Although (this being France of course) it's usually closed Very Happy
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You'll need to Register first of course.
#33 Try to manage your fuel fills so as to buy petrol in Switz....it is MUCH cheaper (just about the only thing that is!)
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 Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Steve Sparks, spot on. Thanks.

Frosty the Snowman, don't know what you mean. Smiley. And you overlooked the spelling of intinsic (sic) which I've also corrected. Smiley. I would of blamed my useless keyboard for both but that's a stretch too far (deliberate !).

Tarquin, wondered who you were until 'Barnserlee'.

rungsp, you're kidding me. I automatically assumed diesel more expensive in Switzerland.

Satnav - out of towns/cities satnav isn't that important and on motoways in particular not really needed but in a town/city, particularly in a foreign country where all the street furniture is different (and if you're other half could get lost on a one-way street) then when you need to make quick decisions satnav can be invaluable. I've driven to Italy with a sheet of A4 paper on the passenger sheet and made one error but I'm still a convert to satnav for towns/cities/places you don't know and as Boris, says, they are uncannily accurate on ETA. Also if you do make a mistake they make recovering it a lot easier.
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
+1 for the satnav for ETA - Despite knowing the route inside out, I like the psycohology of the satnav pacing me (and beating its stupid estimates over the Jura!!)
Re the bakers, I use the one in Pontarlier in the new block right on the roundabout where you turn right past the old town. Then dash off with the buns to the picnic area under Chateau de Joux.
In december, the price in Switz and France for petrol was pretty well identical (not sure about the satan juice, I much prefer 22MPG!!)
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 You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
Nickski, Diesel is more expensive in Switzerland ......... but petrol is cheaper. Amazes me too.
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 Ski the Net with snowHeads
Ski the Net with snowHeads
Diesel is currently 1.91 CHF (£1,29?) It's just gone up from 1.87 (I dont know about petrol as I dont drive with it) This is the only place I know where it goes down for the Christmas break.
I do the run from CH to UK often through the summer, Its not a bad run at all and easy navigation on my route.
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 snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
Agree satnav is useful at "close quarters" ie the last 500m of a journey to somewhere new -- as for distance, I enjoy watching the km on the roadsigns going down and doing the mental arithmetic to convert km to miles, and miles to ETA ... sad I know.

Never bought petrol in CH, I do have a petrol car but it does 20mpg so we tend not to use that one for skiing trips, ahem
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 And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
sanman, Unless you're really caning it or stuck in traffic or bad weather the chances are you are doing around a genuine 120kph average. In which case (though I don't want to take all the fun out of your mental arithmetic) you just look at the distance shown and divide by 2 for the number of minutes it should take! I also keep myself awake by doing the ETA calculations - the rest of them in the car are usually asleep!
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 So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
DJL, too easy. That's not going to keep me awake!
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 You know it makes sense.
You know it makes sense.
Buy diesel in France, Petrol in Switzerland

Preferably making sure your car runs on the correct one of the above
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 Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Just to show how much cheaper petrol is to diesel

Around Matigny/Montreaux etc it is chf 1.72 for petrol
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