 Poster: A snowHead
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New to the site had a look through some of the posts and looks like you've got some good threads going on here.
So thought id pose my problem!
I have been skiing for ten years roughly twice a year, having got married two years ago i was lucky to be allowed off on my annual ski trips as usual =- of course she was invited but she said she didnt want to come but quite happy to let me off on my snowy adventures with my usual crowd.
A few weeks ago before christmas she said she'd like to go on a ski holiday to learn to ski and so in the future we have something lovely to escape of to do on our own. This made me a very happy man. Slightly worried (in case i put her off) I explained that she would have to go to ski school without me to learn as i dont want to teach her (we all know the many thousands of reasons why!!) and also she needs to start at her own level. But that we would meet for a lovely lunch and then in the afternoon we could have a few runs together and explore together etc before enjoying the apres ski. She was fine about this and said that she understood i was an experienced skiier and she needed to learn and that one day she'd be outskiing me! (unfortunately i feel this may well be the case!!)
I exitededly start looking in to possibilities for a week in feb - avoiding the halfterm of course  and i am still busy weighing up an option or 12!
However, the wife is getting cold-feet = not about skiing as such, not about fears of falling over or any of the what i think of typical things but of the ski-lifts!
She had a sudden thought of lifts, chair, gondalas, pomas etc and wanted to cancel our plans immediatley! I laughed (most unhelpfully!) and said dont be sillu its fine - theyre safe,. but she wont have it! She says she hates heights - that feeling of being suspended in midair knowingly (yet she is fine with flying in a plane so i was surprised to hear of this fear) apparently her parents loved cable cars on holidays and she hated every seconds and as soon as she was old enough to strongly did and refuses to go on anything like that now.
Can i reassure her anyway - anyone else feel this way / had this problem? - dont want this to put end to the idea!
Help Please?!
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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I wonder if her real fear might be that she'll get in your way / hold you up / annoy you...
Ideally you'd go with another couple or a group so she had another beginner to share the expereince of learning with - that's half the fun really when you first go...
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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Go somewhere with a funicular and t-bars... 
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arv - yes well that comment fits well with my unhelpful laughter when she first mentioned this fear!
red- im not sure that is the case really - she understands that she would have lessons in her own group and im patient enough to spend the afternoon on a nice easy run. I can go mad for the blacks while she's learning in the morning. I did think about going in a group but most my friends and their wives ski well, or have no interest in it at all or the money to come with, i asked about her friends and she couldnt think of anyone.
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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I have a dreadful fear of heights, but have no problems at all on ski lifts of any kind. I think it is because although high up you face the mountain so don't get the vast feeling of nothingness which makes my knees go wibbly  Not sure if that is much help if she has already experienced them in the past.
Hopefully the first day or so of ski school won't involve anything that goes off the ground and by the time she does her first chair she will have the bug and be too excited to worry.
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snowfiend, Welcome to snowHeads 
Could you not persuade her to have some initial lessons indoors in the UK so that when she is at the required level she can try out the poma in a relatively unthreatening situation? Once she is ok with this (she will not be suspended in mid air) she may feel comfortable about trying easier slopes on a poma in a resort, especially if you choose one with a variety of slopes that can be accessed in this way. If she gets that far she may become as obsessed as the rest of us and that may overcome her fear of chairlifts/cable cars.
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| Quote: |
Could you not persuade her to have some initial lessons indoors in the UK
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very good idea - is she fairly fit and agile? if so, she'll learn quickly, and it will mean one big area of the "unknown" will be removed. One possibility, to level the playing field, would be for you to learn to snowboard, then play together on easy slopes in the afternoon. It would be much more fun for her, watching you fall over, than having you cruising round looking relaxed and expert.
A fear of chairlifts is common, and not irrational. There are some places where she could get round a range of easy slopes using only drags (Les saisies is one, but there are no doubt others) and then having seen people using chairlifts for a few days, she might feel better about trying herself.
Finally, beware of travel in February which can be very busy and expensive. A quiet, off peak, period (either before the second week of February, or in mid March) would be good. It's not much fun for beginners trying to cope with crowded slopes.
We have had entire runs to ourselves today - perfect snow. That's the way to go. Lat week (new year) apart from the appalling weather it was just too busy to bother. If you are teachers, or have school aged kids, there's not much choice. But if you can be flexible, it's far better to avoid holiday periods.
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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| Iski wrote: |
snowfiend, Welcome to snowHeads
Could you not persuade her to have some initial lessons indoors in the UK so that when she is at the required level she can try out the poma in a relatively unthreatening situation? Once she is ok with this (she will not be suspended in mid air) she may feel comfortable about trying easier slopes on a poma in a resort, especially if you choose one with a variety of slopes that can be accessed in this way. If she gets that far she may become as obsessed as the rest of us and that may overcome her fear of chairlifts/cable cars. |
Seconded...get her hooked indoors and she'll deal with the heights when you're out there - once she has the confidence to know she can get down the slope then going up in a lift isn't such a bad feeling. Also agree with picking the resort carefully so she has some runs she can access via a poma. Also see if there's a friend she can get interested too - most people enjoy the learning experience more with a friend then just in a group of randoms...
I really really can't deal with heights at all - I can get scared sitting on the sofa watching the tv, and they do that first-person shot going off the top of the tower block, and I have to reach for the arms of the sofa (wuss I know!) - my 1st chairlift was a nightmare, needed to hold on hard, didn't like the bar being up at the end etc etc. Now I'm prettty blase about them and can happily turn round, chat to people in the chair behind, take photos, take kids up etc etc. I'm sure if she sat on the chair next to a hunky instructor one one side and a friend on the other then it wouldn't be so bad, especially if it service one of the baby slopes - the one in plagne central is probably no more than 10 feet from the ground at all times. Looking up and forwards does help.
Feel free to PM me if you'd like further input on the 'fear of heights thing'
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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I'm not great with heights and found chairlifts and the like very unpleasant when I first went skiing. But I loved skiing so much I was prepared to put up with the fear in order to enjoy sliding down the hill, and gradually got less and less scared. Try to get her to fall in love with skiing and any fears she has about heights will seem less important.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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| Quote: |
A fear of chairlifts is common, and not irrational. There are some places where she could get round a range of easy slopes using only drags (Les saisies is one, but there are no doubt others) and then having seen people using chairlifts for a few days, she might feel better about trying herself.
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pamw is right imo. I have 3 friends who are extremely reluctant to go in a cable car or use a chair lift, although they have "forced" themselves to on occasion. As far as I can see the best approach is to avoid them until the positive desire to get to the top outweighs the negative feelings 
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I can relate as my sister has (I should say, had) a big fear of ski lifts. Not buttons, but chairs or gondola, anything that suspended you above the ground. I took her on her first ski holiday last year, where for the first day or two she stuck to buttons. On day three, there was a small 2-man chair lift up a short easy slope and it was never too far off the ground, and I convinced her to go on it with me. It was a quiet time of year with no one queueing behind us, and it took her a few minutes standing at the queue gates, staring at the chairs whizzing around before she got enough bottle to get on. She did panic a bit once on it, I think she feared the height (what if it breaks/crashes to the ground/she falls off) and also the unknown (how will I get off the other end?). It is an irrational fear and no amount of 'its safe' talk really worked. Once she did that lift a few times her fear eased. There were a couple of scary chairs, with big drops/rickety, which she did not enjoy, but she didnt let her fear prevent her gonig on them...I guess treat it like a rollercoaster?
Good luck!
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You know it makes sense.
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I am not great with heights either and seem to be getting worse a I get older but my love of skiing over rules any fear I may have.
A few peeps have already said it but perhaps a few lessons in the UK and then when the dreaded first chair happens just make sure she is so pre-occupied with having a great time skiing and talking that she does not give herself a chance to think about the negatives. You can chat the whole way pointing out various things going up the hill so she does not get a chance to either look down or backwards.
I hope it all works out well for you
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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lapland
or more to the point lift number 8 at levi
mainly drag lifts because the hills arnt too big and run 8 is a nice gentle slope to learn on
by the end of the week she will be skiing the steeper red runs on the town side of the hill
(they also have a gondola and a couple of chairlifts when she gets her confidence up)
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Poster: A snowHead
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Sounds like an ideal situation, you made all the right encouraging noises, now you can carry on skiing with your mates.
Half the cost; twice the beer.
Sorted.
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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Wsnowfiend,
We went to Andora 3 years ago - hated the chairlifts - terrified my 5-y-o would fall off them.
Last two years been to Niederau in Austria - Beginners slopes at village are pommas and then Gondola to top and more tows. We were all new to skiing and loved the place.
Red ski school is top rated (you get 4 hours a day). Tends to be much cheaper than France - fairly low resort - but snow is good already this year.
Last minute.com doing half board for £279 - 6th Feb at the moment.
might be worth a look
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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DIVORCE
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
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My wife has/had a fear of heights and has tried over the last 5 years to overcome it with a lot of willpower, she has cried on chairlifts and it has drained her energy and effected her enjoyment and progress.
It not only is a challenge on the lifts but also the steeper runs and it is a testament to her willpower she has come so far. Last November we researched and found a reputable Hypnotist, she went for one hour session and was given a cd to listen to when she required. We were hoping for the best but at the same time a little sceptical.
Unfortnately I cannot report that it has worked..... yet..... We are off next Tuesday, and she has lost all anxiety when thinking of the different situations that used to freak her out, also we have tested out her fears on ladders etc and NO WORRIES.....
I will let you know how we get on.
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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saintstephen, very interesting - and encouraging. Yes, please report back on your wife's experience.
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It's not unusual to have a fear of the chairlift for some people or other types of fears on the mountain as one learns to ski and progress in their learning of these experiences. Untill she actually gets out and does it, its a normal feeling to anticipate this for a lot of beginner skiers. I've had ladies scream all the way up the lift ride in fright and at the end when they got off the lift say " that wasn't to bad. Or I've had a lady that would throw up on the lift in fright and I found out her biggest fear was getting off at the end and I told her just to go strait at the end and she said she was always afraid which way to turn and after this she didn't throw up any more!!!!!! I could go on and on about this but as you see it happens and most get over it!!! The best thing your doing is having some one else teach her to ski. Anyways it sounds like your going around this in a very good manner and tell her its normal to feel the way she does and it will pass as it does for just about all as she learns. She will learn to ski from a spot where she can gently walk on the skis to get use to them and progress from a tiny glide to a stop in a safe place on the bottom of the hill and take it a bit at a time and get used to things. Have fun "ski you later!!!!!"
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I can't pretend that I love chairlifts/cable cars but I try to be rational. I'm pretty sure that cable cars are statistically one of the safest modes of transport, and there are many failsafes.
Normally, towards the end of my holiday, I actually begin to enjoy the experience - particularly if the weather is good and there is some lovely scenery to look at as you glide upwards.
If it's a complete deal breaker, there have been some excellent suggestions above where one can get a good amount of skiing done without having to use a chair or gondola - but I like
saintstephen's suggestion, and will be interested to read about the results.
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I'm not great at heights, but accepted chair lifts as necessary if I wanted to ski, which I did.
I still try to avoid taking a chairlift on my own, or in charge of a child, and like to keep a nice tight hold of the bar. I would also suggest avoiding any of the up and over/downwards chairlifts if possible (better to look backwards in a gondola type lift).
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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fill her full of booze she will be fine
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I'm scared of heights but chairlifts etc are fine. Kind of weird but it seems to be the ability to hold on to the bar that is fine. My sister is worse than me andonly recently went on a plane. However, she was up the lift in Hemsedal in the summer.
Cheers
Bob
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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thebrownslug, hahahaha.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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snowfiend, is she scared of lifts? Is she scared of chairs? If the answer to both these is no, youre' sorted! 
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Thank you for all the advice!
I think that taking some lessons in uk in a snow dome or something would be a good idea. not sure where though as nowhere very close and also the uk weather is against us at the moment!
She even seems a little nervous about pomas and drags but not in the same way about the chairs and gondolas as you are not suspended in the air - more about not being fully incontrol but i think that fear will be overcome not so sure about the height thing though!
I hope that she will not be put off but at the moment she is still adament about not going up a mountain and yet still wants to learn to ski!
Only a woman could say this im sure hehe... only joking of course.
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You know it makes sense.
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I took a girlfriend a couple of years ago who announced she was terrified of the lifts on the drive down through France...nice timing.
However once we got to the resort and she saw the lifts her fears were put at ease, I think she had visions of dangling from a rickety chair on a piece of string 200 feet up in the air. Once she saw they were massive highly engineered chunks of metal she was ok. Maybe it would help to show her some photos of the larger chairlifts and gondolas?
Best steer clear of the rickety chairs on string for the first day.
Andy
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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Make her only use drag lifts for the first 4 days. She'll soon get over it.
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Poster: A snowHead
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Specifically - how about Flaine? The Forum nursery slope has a chair lift that is about 2 feet off the ground, the yoghurt pots from Forum to Foret are tamer than an Under 3 disney ride and the ball-acher drag lift takes you half way up the mountain (and obviously she won't have the eponymous problem) - you could do your first 3 days without being out of touching distance from the ground. Finally the DMZ lift to Grand Platierre is about the size of a tube train - stand in the middle and you can't see out!
Good luck in persuading...
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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Andy - she has seen many pics of my ski trips with lifts and gondolas in view and still no help.
Kewhoward- sounds like a possibility = will look in to it - is there plenty of fun for me too? (or is that being selfish!)
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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snowfiend, Take her to Wengen. There is a moving pvement lft for begineers in the village and if you want to go up the moutain you can go on the train
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
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| Quote: |
I took a girlfriend a couple of years ago
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How many have you got?!?
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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You'll need to Register first of course.
You'll need to Register first of course.
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If you do decide to look at Flaine as a serious prospect you'll find lots about it on here - very mixed views about the architecture but most agree its a great bowl to ski in and tends to hold good snow. All routes lead back to the centre so very easy to meet up. If you can escape for half a day you can get over to the neighbouring resorts in the Grand Massif too.
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If you look at Flaine you'll find lots about it on here - very mixed views about the architecture but most agree its a great bowl to ski in and tends to hold good snow. All routes lead back to the centre so very easy to meet up. If you can escape for half a day you can get over to the neighbouring resorts in the Grand Massif too.
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I 4th or 5th the suggestion for some acclimatisation sessions at an indoor snowdome in the UK before going. It might get her a bit more relaxed with all the paraphernalia involved with skiing so that the additional difficulty of actually getting to the top of a slope is not as daunting.
I also suggest going somewhere the pistes are going to be relatively empty (certainly not anywhere at Feb half-term) and surely other Snowheads can suggest resorts that have nice easy magic carpet rides on the Nursery Slopes and gondola's or drag lifts that take you up to some empty wide blues?
I just came back from learning to Snowboard at Champoluc and the (empty) Nursery slopes had a magic carpet and further up the valley in Frachey theres a new fast funicular that takes you up to three linked Blue runs.
PS Next time she's says she's scared, don't laugh. I know its hard, but try to take her seriously, it sounds like she's looking for excuses not to do it, as i was when i wasn't sure about learning to snowboard on my own.
In fact, offer to pay for private lessons if you have the dosh, I had those and I felt much better looked after than i would have been in a group lesson. Although I didn't have to face a chairlift while strapped to a Board i would have felt much more confident about it with my lovely private instructor who i know would have ensured i didn't get into trouble...
Good luck!
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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Thanks for the suggestions .
I personally feel that she will be fine once she gets going but dont want to risk getting there and it all being chair access and her refusing to do anything because she told me that she was scared and wouldnt go on them etc... (i have married a gorgeous intelligent but extremely stubborn women!)
She is however still keen (a women full of condradictions!) and whilst out shopping this weekend she suggested we have a look at some ski gear for her altough not buying till booked! - the idea it would involve some sort of shopping (with my credit card!) seemed to encourage her further/
Will look into lessons in a snowdome and try to fit something in somewhere - i agree that in this case some acclimatisation may be a good idea!
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I would book the holiday somewhere where skiing is not the only activity. Book luxury accommodation with pool etc so your wife knows that she will not have to ski all day every day. If she puts less pressure on herself over the skiing she may feel more relaxed and not worry about the lifts so much. If getting on a lift feels the be all and end all she might worry more and feel anxious in the weeks before the holiday.
If she mentions to the instructor that she is worried about lifts maybe she could sit next to him/her when it is time to go on a chair lift.
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FAQ
