Compliant skiing

A snowHead

Morning.
This isn't a self absorbed whinge I came to skiing latish (near 30) and have always been an anxious type of person sadly. I try so hard not to be and get so frustrated with myself that I can't do what I want to my self preservation kicks in and can't let go and just enjoy it. As a result suffer considerably with fatigue mentally and physically. I should say at this point im on a board that's how I started out I've tried to swap but doesn't click and decided at least I can't get about on the board.
My wife and kids (11 and 8 ) ski and really enjoy it so don't want to throw in the towell and deprive them but acutely aware my snow career won't be long.
What tires me more are flat transitions to ski runs, cambers, runs with a bowl also when we ski it's very busy adds to the stress. Appreciate nothing is perfect and I need to dig deep too.
My early snow holidays were at Schladming which are lovely wide trails. Can folks suggest ski areas that might suit my particular peculiarities really within driving distance from calais as we are locked Into school holidays?
I'm sure I'm not the only person with the will but lack of talent.
Appreciate your input.

A snowHead

A few suggestions that might help:

Take the kids out of school and go outside of the half term holidays. Will help with the volume on the slopes for a less stressful time on the mountain. Also will help the wallet!

Try some private lesson (with saved cash from above). One on one coaching will be a massive benefit.

I'm not sure about Schladming (not been) but go to a ski in ski out pedestrian resort. This helps alleviate that time from getting ready, to hitting the slopes, which can build anxiety.

Also, don't be worried about taking an afternoon (or day depending on how you're feeling) off the slopes while in resort. Most have additional snow related activities to do on and off the slopes. Will take the mind off of skiing for a bit and help with balance. Alternatively, a nice long lunch and an early finish can help. Remember its a holiday and meant to be fun and enjoyable, so do other things that make it just that.

Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?

@James77, when do you usually go away as a family?

If I was restricted to just school holidays, and concerned about it being too busy I'd be looking at going away at Easter. Christmas/New Year and Feb half terms are super busy, but come Easter, half the skiing population have forgotten skiing exists so don't bother, especially when Easter is later in to April.

Pick somewhere high, like Val Thorens, and you'll not have too much issue with snow. Snowheads even run trips there for 2 weeks at the end of the season, a family week and an end of season bash.

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I appreciate that you’ll get fined for taking the kids out of school but it’s usually a derisory amount compared to the cost savings on your holiday. As said above use the savings for a private lesson, it will help you immensely.

I hope you can clear this hurdle to have a long term relationship with the mountains. FWIW at least 1 regular on the off-piste bash is in his 70s having never skied until his 50s so it can be done! Good luck!

Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.

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My other suggestion for anyone UK based is to get some time on an indoor slope beforehand if you live close enough to one. Some lessons & a bit of practice always help (do it over the summer and they're normally empty and there'll be offers on things like lessons / monthly passes).

Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...

Thank you for suggestions so far and not for just saying get a grip which I appreciate is easy to do.

I love the mountains always have but unfortunately family were not able to afford ski holidays when we were kids in 90s so only able go when I could save myself.

We're currently in val cenis kids having a ball it's fantastic watching them.

Boarding as much as I can even permanent sense of doom in my stomach. I'm not a quiter just need to find ways to reduce stress and worry. Anxiety is so difficult to explain can't tell you all how much it frustrates me but we can't change who we are.

After all it is free

On the anxiety thing....have you tried therapy (assuming it's more than just making you nervous to board / ski)? I had loads of problems with food years ago and went to a therapist (randomly the bloke off Freaky Eaters on the TV) and it was transformative. Literally one session changed my life.

There'll be an underlying reason you're anxious. Deep down you probably know what it is, know it's irrational etc etc. Talking through it with a professional can make a massive difference. Yeah, you're probably never likely to end up being carefree and jumping off Corbett's Couloir or anything but it might be enough to sort some of your head out (and it's way cheaper than loads of ski / snowboard lessons).

*Ski* the Net with snowHeads

To avoid crowds, just go somewhere which most people here don't talk about most of the time. There are thousands of places to snowboard, and most of them no one in UK ever heard of... they all go to the crowded "big name" places. So don't do that, just find somewhere good that no one knows about. Example don't go to Verbier, go to Ovronnaz. And don't stick to the same schedule everyone else has. So get the first chair, not the one everyone lines up for once they stagger out of bed mid-morning. Don't stop for lunch when everyone else does; that's a quiet time on the slopes. And if there's a "change over day" (typically Saturday), don't arrive at the airport that day, but do snowboard on it, to avoid the crowds.

Looking at the French stats, wide runs have their plusses and minuses from a risk perspective; people go faster on those, which seems to increase risk.

Flats... most snowboarders don't read terrain well, especially "intermediate" folk. If you can see it coming, you can often avoid it completely, but you have to look ahead. And not fall on flats, of course. A decent wax job suitable for the prevailing conditions helps too - at a resort I'll usually be sailing through stuff where folk who "don't need wax" are walking. In fresh snow, always let some skiers put a track across any flat first, then jump on that... they walk, you don't! Failing that, you'll get good at pushing the board with one foot out at least wink

Stress.. sounds like something which clinical support may help. I like listening to music whilst I ride, but I'm also happy looking at what's behind me, so that may not be appropriate here.

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One option for a family holiday on chilled out, empty slopes would be somewhere like Ruka in Finland (although that's a flight rather than a drive). Mellow, family friendly, quiet. Only downside is the temp (currently -20).

snow reports

And, at the risk of seeming defeatist, skiing or snowboarding are not for everybody. But if you decide the stress just spoils it for you (and some private lessons would be well worth a go before deciding that) it won't mean your family can't enjoy their skiing. You can do other stuff - walk, snowshoe, sit in a café with a drink and a good book, do some shopping and cook them a nice supper.

You know it makes sense.

@James77, Have you had any snowboard lessons? And same question for skiing as I read you've also tried that? A *good* instructor in either should be able to work with you on building confidence.

Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:

Anywhere with good private instruction.

A snowHead

If you want snowboard instruction, I'd look for a specific recommendation. Some French instructors (and perhaps some Austrian and Italian ones too) took on snowboarding as an additional discipline and aren't necessarily great instructors. I had lessons with a French instructor I rated highly for skiing and really, he wasn't much cop.

A snowHead

@James77,
Go on the Snowheads family bash.

Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?

@kitenski, I have im not self taught. Started at Aldershot dry slope (we live nearby) and progressed to indoor before the Alps. But never had consistent lessons just on and off. I think you're right I could do with some more really need to work on switch riding.
On up side we had a great day today spent time 1 on 1 with my 11 year old who's progressing so well on skis. Strange how those situations puts your mind in a different place focusing on him and not worrying about myself results in some great fun. Just need to harness that and more tuition.

Great advice on snowheads bash too.

Really appreciate everyone's input.

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I used to teach people to ride motorcycles around race tracks (as a hobby, not a profession). Just like skiing, the impact of fear materially changes your ability to do the activity because a tense body changes the physics.

Frequently, and perhaps this might help you, people were not consciously aware of how tense they’d become and focussing on relaxation really helped their riding because it breaks that vicious cycle. You’re tense, so you don’t perform as well and then you get nervous because you’re not performing.

No idea if it will work but here are some of things we did to get people to relax

- stick your tongue between your teeth; you can’t do this if your jaw muscles are tense
- sing a song out loud and focus on remembering the exact words
- waggle your elbows continously (it’s very hard to do if your shoulders are tense)
- close your eyes, focus your mind’s eye on something that relaxes you and breathe deeply and consciously for two minutes BEFORE you go onto the snow. Remember that focus and, if you start getting tense, recall the item that you used to relax

Hope that helps; those tricks did have material impact on some riders … but not all.

Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.

I find that skiing with music helps - distracts my mind, and definitely trying to relax - but the main thing for me is finding quiet slopes which is not easy in half term, but we’ve skied Les Sybelles, Grand Bornand and found both of them to be less crowded and easy to drive to.

We used to take the kids out for 2 days and go Thurs-Sun - that way your first and last days skiing are Saturdays which are quieter and you get 7 days skiing which is a bonus - we’d stay enroute Thurs night and sometimes we had to stay elsewhere on the Friday night as accommodation is generally Sat-Sat and we leave the resort around 4pm on the Sat to drive home so stop en route about 11pm

Help!!

Compliant skiing

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