 Poster: A snowHead
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Is usually a good answer when describing what you should do to make something happen when skiing. Where to apply pressure, how much movement you should make, skidding vs carving, etc.... But are there any absolute "rules" in skiing that instead of saying "it depends" we would say NEVER EVER or ALWAYS MAKE SURE you should do/not do something... Silly comments welcome as well as serious ones 
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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Always remember to have your favoured turnward foot upmost and ensure you initiate using a counter-wising clockweighted swing rotation; unless skiing south of the Equator, in which case the Coriolis effect reverses the above to the below and you should swap skis or ski backwards. Of course, this is the only correct way to ski pitches inclined between 17 and -28 degrees; and declined before half-past four.
Overly fretting about carving angulation, improper pole plants and inner tip leads to sub-optimal fun conditions, and one should NEVER ski while experiencing sub-optimal fun.
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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| skimottaret wrote: |
| Is usually a good answer when describing what you should do to make something happen when skiing. Where to apply pressure, how much movement you should make, skidding vs carving, etc.... But are there any absolute "rules" in skiing that instead of saying "it depends" we would say NEVER EVER or ALWAYS MAKE SURE you should do/not do something... Silly comments welcome as well as serious ones |
Not an instructor but I can see a place for almost everything at times.
I question whether it is ever right to ski with stiff legs* or throw your upper body around though
*OK your downhill leg may be quite stiff when setting high edge angles but only temporarily
** if you are doing other things wrong then throwing the upper body around may be the only way you can get the skis round but that doesn't make it the right option
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
You need to Login to know who's really who.
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ALWAYS MAKE SURE you pole whack
Apologies @skimottaret,
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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@skimottaret, some absolutes ...
- never eat the yellow snow
- don't follow someone else's tracks
- you've got no friends on a powder day
- it can't have been your line if I just poached it
- there's only one reason to carry someone else's skis 
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You'll need to Register first of course.
You'll need to Register first of course.
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Always buy your instructor an espresso.
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Or any form of coffee... 
@Timberwolf, remind me .... ???
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Oh, yes, right boot on right foot, (left boot on left foot). Srsly. Had a client complain about boot pain ... 2s fix.
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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How about the pointy end of skis go at the front (twin tips excepted obviously but only park rats ride those). Had to help a beginner with that one once when they couldnt get into the bindings when trying to clip in facing the wrong way.
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Sing to yourself whilst skiing. Helps you relax and get in a rhythm.
If feeling brave, you can also try singing really loud when in the queue for the lifts and you'll end up with a big space around you. No-one will step on your skis and there will be no pushing or shoving you.
I regularly saw a guy do this on the Circle line in London. You could here him coming; singing Rule Britania at the top of his voice. He used to wear a bowler hat and had an umbrella against each shoulder, like sloping arms with a rifle. It could be jam packed, but a large space would appear around him on the platform. He'd step onto the train with no shoving and he continued when he got on the tube; again a space would gradually appear around him. He was either genuinely nuts or very clever with large cajones.
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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Swear.
As you are skiing down a scary slope and you lose control a bit, make sure you shout "F*****ck, f*ck, f*ck, f*ck, f*ck!" before rescuing yourself with a hastily applied hockey stop, then having a slightly insane laugh.
Make sure that AT LEAST once a day, you stop, look around, and ask yourself the question "Why the  am I doing this? Seriously, I've paid thousands of pounds to throw myself down a f*cking mountain with a pair of skirting boards strapped to my feet, why?"
Happy to help.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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Never claim you are better than you are, if a member of a Forum - as at some point you will be found out. 
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@Awdbugga, I always "give a little whistle"
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You know it makes sense.
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Never ever get into a discussion about inner tip lead.
Never ever have a day's skiing without laughing at yourself for something stupid you have done.
Always remember if you get on a shitty scrapey piste that power sliding is fast, efficient and a good laff.
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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Remember to breathe
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Poster: A snowHead
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Never ...
.... tell the other half how much your ski equipment really costs.
.... speak to DG about terms and conditions or taxes.
.... put an "O" on the end of anyones login name.
.... share Masque's vapor rub.
.... look up Boris's skirt. (what has been seen cannot be unseen)
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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Never try to teach your significant other.
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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| Tubaski wrote: |
| Never try to teach your significant other. |
This, then the yellow snow. Nuff said.
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
You need to Login to know who's really who.
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@Dave of the Marmottes,
Technically, the “racing sideslip” ...
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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I like it when I get to the stage of the lesson and I say “Just Ski”
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You'll need to Register first of course.
You'll need to Register first of course.
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| Tubaski wrote: |
| Never try to teach your significant other. |
Forgot about that one but plus a million
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@marodo2712, Like it... I actually have an exercise called the f**k, F**k, F******K drill for learning steep skiing
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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@skimottaret, @rob@rar, why do I suspect that one or both of you have been scarred by personal experience? 
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@Hurtle, replace "scarred" by crippled or permanently damaged
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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| skimottaret wrote: |
| @Hurtle, replace "scarred" by crippled or permanently damaged |
This. On one occasion when I tried to teach Jane we both ended up in tears, of rage or frustration.
On the other hand, when I taught Mrs-skimottaret it was a delight.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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and she probably bought you a coffee, never happened when I tried to teach her 
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| skimottaret wrote: |
| and she probably bought you a coffee, never happened when I tried to teach her |
Always.
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You know it makes sense.
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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On a slightly more serious note one "rule" of skiing I can think of is that it is never useful have more weight on your inside ski than your outside one..
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Poster: A snowHead
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@skimottaret, unless your outside ski has unexpectedly left the ground for some reason....
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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I was just about to edit that to say "on purpose" but you beat me to it
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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| Quote: |
it is never useful have more weight on your inside ski than your outside one
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What about kick turns ?
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
You need to Login to know who's really who.
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or worm turns for that matter. but I was thinking only about sliding downhill
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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@skimottaret, skating an uphill traverse?
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You'll need to Register first of course.
You'll need to Register first of course.
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So never have more weight on your inside ski unless you should. Thats clear.
Surely you shouldn't even have your skis on inside unless you're at a fridge - it'll ruin the Axminster!
Tsk. Skiers... 
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So which was his inside ski? Was it unweighted and is that why he crashed at the end?
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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Always make sure the avalanche transceiver is turned on and in send mode when starting the day
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FAQ
