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My Skiing Room 101

 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
My Skiing Room 101 , whats yours ?

The words "Bluebird" , "Epic" and "Awesome" , whats wrong with Sunny and clear , Good and Brilliant . I must say I really hate the word Bluebird never seen one this side of the Globe .

Powder Skirts not done up and hanging down/out .

One leg of the Ski trousers left above the boot .

Not Filling chair lifts when there's a big queue .
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Old chairlifts were a tall bloke like me can't is legs tuck up and ski's on the bar, so have to leave the limbs dangling.
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Ditto the ski trousers above the boots....
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 You need to Login to know who's really who.
You need to Login to know who's really who.
BANZAI..........as I watched 40 squaddies let loose on their first ever ski slope run in Southern Germany!
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
After a long gondola ride, friends deciding to faff with their layers,helmet strap, buckles etc . Why not do it on the way up?
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You'll need to Register first of course.
With the amount of pet peves gripes and things people hate that has cropped up recently here I am starting to think that nobody actually likes skiing/boarding or being in the mountains.

Smile unwind if they are not interfering with our safety & are not interfering with your space there is nothing that can ruin the moutnians.
ski holidays
 Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Fattes13, well said!
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
Layne wrote:
Old chairlifts were a tall bloke like me can't is legs tuck up and ski's on the bar, so have to leave the limbs dangling.


Old chairlifts where short birds like me have to shuffle forwards to get their feet on the bar.
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 You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
Fattes13 wrote:
With the amount of pet peves gripes and things people hate that has cropped up recently here I am starting to think that nobody actually likes skiing/boarding or being in the mountains.

Smile unwind if they are not interfering with our safety & are not interfering with your space there is nothing that can ruin the moutnians.


+1

But while we're at it - my latest pet peeve is the whole Room 101 thing.

Room 101 in Nineteen Eighty-Four was a torture chamber where your spirit was broken by having to face your worst nightmare: Winston Smith was afraid of rats so he was threatened by being eaten alive by them. He denounced his lover and accepted that 2+2+=5 if the Party said so.

The idea has been diluted (mainly by the mildly amusing TV programme) to cover the most minor of irritations.
Who cares how other people wear their bloody ski pants ffs?
George Orwell must be spinning in his grave.


Last edited by You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net. on Sat 2-03-13 14:24; edited 1 time in total
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 Ski the Net with snowHeads
Ski the Net with snowHeads
Fattes13 wrote:
... there is nothing that can ruin the moutnians.


You just did!! wink
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 snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
Mosha Marc, Laughing
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 And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
Indeed Laughing
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 So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
Simon94, Was that in Nesslewang by any chance? I saw the same thing about 8 years ago, a bit scary but also very, very funny as long as you weren't in the way.
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 You know it makes sense.
You know it makes sense.
Belgians
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 Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Woman in our group, we get the 9 o'clock lift get up to top of mountain and all ready to go and she decides she needs to go to the toilet, buga!
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 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
Simon94 wrote:
BANZAI..........as I watched 40 squaddies let loose on their first ever ski slope run in Southern Germany!


Way back in the '80s I was one of those Squaddies. Learn to snowplough in the morning, head to the top of the nearest mountain in the afternoon and hurl our selves down the steepest slope we could find. The folly of youth. Embarassed
snowHead
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
I was somewhat gobsmacked and dismayed at the response of 4 out of 6 skiers in my group ski lesson that decided they wanted to stick to pisted runs when there was plenty of untracked powder that the instructor wanted to take us on! Other than that I consider it a godsend to be on the mountains in whatever conditions are available and won't allow petty cr@p to spoil the joy of being on the white and fluffy stuff. Very Happy
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Twisted knees which result from a slow pathetic fall in fresh snow on the start of day 3.
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 You need to Login to know who's really who.
You need to Login to know who's really who.
low cloud/fog
Wind - meteorological variety (mostly)
lift queues
silly restaurant prices
knees
runny nose
ski buses
salopette straps
ski boots
slush
lift passes that don't work
the sound of a snowboard on a frozen piste
stationary ski lifts ........

Everything else is simply amazing Smile
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
If I had to do a "room 101" I would not put skiing in.

Maybe after beatings, electrocution and when threatened with being eaten alive by rats like Winston Smith, I would denounce skiing and agree that blue sky days are miserable.
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You'll need to Register first of course.
CAGEY!
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 Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Cynic, Twisted Evil Twisted Evil Very Happy
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
Quote:

Woman in our group, we get the 9 o'clock lift get up to top of mountain and all ready to go and she decides she needs to go to the toilet, buga!


- Then she has to go again when you reach the top.

Kaiser846, you've clearly met my OH.
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 You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
Ski Instructors telling me what boots to sell their clients, only to then be seen by me with their Touring boots and incompatable bindings skiing for their pleasure.
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 Ski the Net with snowHeads
Ski the Net with snowHeads
"Cheeky" when referring to a ski break
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 snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
Quote:

Simon94, Was that in Nesslewang by any chance? I saw the same thing about 8 years ago, a bit scary but also very, very funny as long as you weren't in the way.

robapplegate, /NeddySkiGoon, ...Rob, very close to that area, Oberjoch and to Needskigoon, yes I was also one of them squad bods, I was fortuante to have my own ski attire at the time, but watching hoardes of lads pile down the hill in all the same attire not knowing how to snow plough let alone ski, was a site for sour eyes!! At least it only got better from there on.. Laughing
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 And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
whooping americans why oh why oh why . can't wait till Monday when they all have to go back to work and leave me with the place to myself
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 So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
"pow"

"Cham"

"siiiiiiiiiiiiick...."

gangly gap year ski bums who think possession of beanies and oversized jackets / non descript denims / skater runners are more important than actually skiing (or bothering to learn French / German)

people in long lift queues letting chairs go with one person on them so all four of them can sit together

people in long lift queues letting chairs go with no-one on them because one of the four made a balls of getting on the next chair

inflicting a hangover on each successive morning after promising not to on the previous day

never making the first lift, ever, despite waking up / fighting with the alarm / lying there listening to the plumbing noises while thinking about having promised yourself yesterday that you would be getting the first lift

skis

boots

listening to idiot domineering ski know it all english speaking bufoon males engaged in monologue lectures at their mute subservient deeply unhappy wives about what they / the lift operators / the resort / the French / the Conservatives are doing wrong for the entire duration of the lift run

texting, or at least trying to, while on the chair lift

missing calls because of the extra 14 seconds it takes to get to your phone while on the piste. then having the return call ring out for the same reason leading to three to four runs interrupted by phone tennis rallies

"where are you?" "where?" "Chamrousse 1 or Chamrousse 2?" " The lift or the piste?" "Did you take that left at the end?"

€170 extra on the phone bill due to the last three

Being forced into buying a balaclava / goggles yet again despite having bought ones on each of the previous trips but never being able to find them for some reason / realising you bought a piece of crap in a hurry the last time

I do like skiing though don't I? Puzzled
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 You know it makes sense.
You know it makes sense.
One piece suits,

dogs (poo-poo) on ski holidays


Last edited by You know it makes sense. on Sun 3-03-13 12:14; edited 1 time in total
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 Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
8611, Laughing

And an extra Laughing for the oh-so-familiar phone conversation!
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 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
My missus when given the chance of a private lesson with a ski instructor on empty, pristine slopes (when the rest of the class went home on Sat transfers the day before) - then asked if she could have a coffee stop !!!
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Sounds familiar .... Toofy Grin
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
sequoiaboard wrote:
After a long gondola ride, friends deciding to faff with their layers,helmet strap, buckles etc . Why not do it on the way up?


Definitely! We call it "Le Faffage". it's the 8th deadly sin.
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
Quote:

Definitely! We call it "Le Faffage". it's the 8th deadly sin.


my Forte
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Quote:


My missus when given the chance of a private lesson with a ski instructor on empty, pristine slopes (when the rest of the class went home on Sat transfers the day before) - then asked if she could have a coffee stop !!!


Good lass, give the guy a day off, gettin a second day off in a week is a dream come true for most instructors, nothing makes us happier than an unexpected day off !
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You'll need to Register first of course.
Quote:

listening to idiot domineering ski know it all english speaking bufoon males engaged in monologue lectures at their mute subservient deeply unhappy wives about what they / the lift operators / the resort / the French / the Conservatives are doing wrong for the entire duration of the lift run


found a cure for that. Say how proud you are to be a founding memebr of UKIP. Said idiot then turns a funny shade of puce and remains silent until the lift ride finishes (although as one skis off, the noise in the rear hits epic proportions).

Quote:

After a long gondola ride, friends deciding to faff with their layers,helmet strap, buckles etc . Why not do it on the way up?


TBH I understand that. The locals have a side economy scouting under and around the start and finsih of lifts come the thaw - you would not believe what people drop. I have seen more than one 'recovered' watch, never mind gloves, poles, maps, lip salve, googles, sunglasses, etc., etc.. Best leave it until you are stationary. And it applies to gondolas too.

Quote:

inflicting a hangover on each successive morning after promising not to on the previous day


trick is not to sober up until back at work then take a sickie - they'll believe it when they see you turn sober.
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 Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
re the bluebirds - they don't see them Cardiff any more either, since the Malaysian bloke turned up!
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
truffaut wrote:
"Cheeky" when referring to a ski break


+1 why does a 3 day ski break always get referred to as cheeky?
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 You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
Confused people who aren't actually that good but don't know it, who ski at 100% of their capability assuming no minor variations in snow condition, terrain or other skiers crossing their path. Accidents waiting for someone to hit. Skiing down a slope with those people can go in room 101.
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 Ski the Net with snowHeads
Ski the Net with snowHeads
sequoiaboard wrote:
After a long gondola ride, friends deciding to faff with their layers,helmet strap, buckles etc . Why not do it on the way up?


+1 on the faffage. Not only is is not skiing, it's also spending time you could be skiing not skiing. And if you're really good at it, you could be preventing other people from skiing.

Other forms of faffage: having a cheeky drink or quick snack, cleaning goggles, blowing nose, taking forever to get the settings on the videocamera right, getting a panorama shot on the smartphone, dabbling in the backpack for no apparent reason,...
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