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Lardy Mouth Stretching Exercises to maximise 'Tart Swallowing' before Death.

 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
Step 1: Open the garage door, rather, ask someone to open the garage door for you, otherwise you'll be to tired for the next step.
Step 2: Ask the same person to go to your kitchen and get your car keys, oh and, ask them to knock you up a full fry up, no doubt by now you're starving.
Step 3: Ask the said person to reverse your car out and to bring it within an inch of your 'About the House' Wheel chair.
Step 4: Ask said person to transfer you to the back of the car and deliver a cream tea(clotted cream!) it's probably been minutes since your last snack.
Step 5: Ask said person to operate the vehicle whilst you sit in the drivers seat As otherwise you get car sick and wouldn't want to lose any of those prescious calories!
Step 6: Drive thru KFC.
Step 7: Drive thru McD
Step 7: On to M&S
Step 8:Reverse steps 5 and 4 and ask the person to then wheel you around the food hall as you want to see what all the fuss is about Myleen Class givin' it:
" This is not just any block of Lard, it's 'Chased by a lardy, startled free range pig and Sage Lard.'"
Step 9: Buy alot of cake.
Step 10: Get your assistant to wheel you over to the Lingere as you've never touched any before and remove the chosen item from it's coat hanger.
Step 11: Stuff coat hanger in your fat mouth sideways, remove, stuff it in, remove. Repeat this daily until you can fit a dustbin lid in your fat mouths. Toofy Grin


Last edited by Poster: A snowHead on Sat 7-07-07 9:42; edited 1 time in total
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
I read the first word of this title as "Lady" which gives the whole thing a completely different slant Confused
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
SMALLZOOKEEPER, Its important that Step 4 is with clotted cream

When does the smoking ban come into france?
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 You need to Login to know who's really who.
You need to Login to know who's really who.
Frosty the Snowman, No idea, i'm kinda 'deliberatly ignorant' when it come to current affairs and don't tend to pay too much attention to rules. I'll just go somewhere i can smoke.
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
admin, so did I Laughing Laughing
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