Poster: A snowHead
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My son is four-turning-five and we're taking him skiing for the first time in February. He was very much up for the idea originally - he enjoyed having a ride on my skis when it snowed here last winter and he's enjoyed watching PoV videos on YouTube - but he suddenly seems to have decided that he's petrified of skiing! That's not in response to anything that I can think of, he just seemed to go off the idea.
Hopefully, he'll change his mind again soon, but does anybody have any tips on ways to encourage him or things we can do to make it less daunting when we're out there? (We've already got the resort and the ski school booked, so not much we can do on that side of things.)
This is my first proper ski trip in over a decade and I'm dreading the possibility of it turning into a nightmare if he's miserable.
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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My advice is not to push him into any situation in which he will be miserable. Try stuff out, but back off if it isn't working out. Let him dictate the pace (within reason).
Try other snow related activities, like bum boarding....find what he does enjoy, encourage him and keep him warm, with regular hot chocolate stops.
At this stage, its about making the holiday fun....and not ingraining a dislike of a skiing holiday early on.
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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@ChrisP71, has he had any lessons in the UK?
My girls did several dry ski slope lessons ahead of every trip.
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Alcohol? Xanax?
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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+1 to both the above, or if you have a rink nearby, a few ice skating sessions will be immense help. My kids instructors always said they could immediately spot kids who’d skated before.
Emotionally, think of it as a winter holiday with some skiing, not a ski holiday. Plan a lot of non ski stuff - they never tire of sledging, or swimming if there’s a pool.
My son was the same age (just turned 5) when he started, and had a whale of a time. However, we did find that a couple of hours in the morning and a few runs after lunch was enough. We were home by 2 each day.
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You'll need to Register first of course.
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Duplicate
Last edited by You'll need to Register first of course. on Wed 20-11-19 18:28; edited 1 time in total
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UANN posted ahead of me so I’m not neccesarily endorsing his approach...!
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Oops
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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@snowdave,
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@ChrisP71, it will be all change again next week so I wouldn’t worry at the moment. Short stints, sledging, snowballs and hot chocolate. And 2 pairs of mitts at all times in case 1 pair gets wet
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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A trip to an indoor snow slope beforehand (if one isn't too far from you) involving snowy activities may help, and/or an introductory lesson. Tamworth has an area away from the main slope where the kids can play in the "snow". I think the best thing is not to remind him that he's decided to be scared. Do you think he might also be scared because he thinks he will have to be away from mum and dad when he has lessons?
Sometimes there can be tears at the handover for a lesson-like the first day of school, but once parents are off the scene, with a sympathetic instructor, children usually come round to the idea pretty quickly. One question though-how big are the groups in the ski school. If its the ESF in France and it's half term-the instructor may have more wee'uns than would be ideal.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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Perty wrote: |
A trip to an indoor snow slope beforehand (if one isn't too far from you) involving snowy activities may help, and/or an introductory lesson. Tamworth has an area away from the main slope where the kids can play in the "snow". I think the best thing is not to remind him that he's decided to be scared. Do you think he might also be scared because he thinks he will have to be away from mum and dad when he has lessons?
Sometimes there can be tears at the handover for a lesson-like the first day of school, but once parents are off the scene, with a sympathetic instructor, children usually come round to the idea pretty quickly. One question though-how big are the groups in the ski school. If its the ESF in France and it's half term-the instructor may have more wee'uns than would be ideal. |
I'm not quite sure what's triggered it, but I think it might be the notion that he'll just be tipped off the top of a black run somewhere and expected to ski down. I'm not sure he realises that he'll have an instructor physically holding onto him for the first few days (possibly all the days at that age).
Someone mentioned before that it was worth familiarising him with the routine beforehand - even if it was only getting used to putting boots on and things like that. Unfortunately, we're a bit out in the sticks. Even our nearest dry slope is an hour away and it's two or three times that to get to a snowdome. I was wondering about a trip to the dry slope, but thought that a few falls on Dendix on a drizzly day in England could do more harm than good to his confidence.
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@ChrisP71, where abouts are you? Our local slope isn’t Dendix and is the nicest of the artificial surfaces I have tried. It is Snowtrax (near Bournemouth)
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You know it makes sense.
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NickyJ wrote: |
@ChrisP71, where abouts are you? Our local slope isn’t Dendix and is the nicest of the artificial surfaces I have tried. It is Snowtrax (near Bournemouth) |
We're on the Devon/Somerset border, so Exeter or Sandford are closest to us.
Funnily enough, I've got friends in Bournemouth and my one and only attempt at snowboarding was at Snowtrax!
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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ChrisP71 wrote: |
NickyJ wrote: |
@ChrisP71, where abouts are you? Our local slope isn’t Dendix and is the nicest of the artificial surfaces I have tried. It is Snowtrax (near Bournemouth) |
We're on the Devon/Somerset border, so Exeter or Sandford are closest to us.
Funnily enough, I've got friends in Bournemouth and my one and only attempt at snowboarding was at Snowtrax! |
Their kids lessons on the weekend are good and they also regularly (though could be an off peak thing) £5 taster lessons, which could help, if you can time visiting your friend?
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Poster: A snowHead
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If he’s been watching POV ski videos might it all look a bit fast and scary?
I’d explain that children just start in the nursery garden. He won’t be on a red on day 1 but maybe he doesn’t realise that. You can see videos of 4 year olds shuffling round the ski gardens so maybe show him them instead.
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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If he's in a ski kindergarten sort of thing, my experience is that they're quite comfortable with allowing kids who are less enthusiastic to not-ski, while allowing the enthusiast to get out more. Perhaps see if that type of facility is what you're getting, rather than race camp. You should be able to find pictures/videos of ski kindergartens; the slopes, magic carpets etc and seeing lots of youngsters playing/skiing may help.
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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@ChrisP71, when my kids have expressed worry about something I've used the tactic of not mentioning or discussing at all. Or at least if they do raise it "playing it down" and moving the conversation on quickly. Quite often by the time it comes around to it they've forgotten/overcome their fears and/or as it actually happens they overcome their fear. Especially if it involves a third party, not mum and dad, taking over. In this case a ski instructor.
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@Layne, +1
Sometimes a worried parent-as in a parent worrying about their child being scared and offering lots of support, reinforces the fears of the worried child. Too much reassurance can ramp up the fear rather than a cheery "Have fun, see you later!"
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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Perty wrote: |
@Layne, +1
Sometimes a worried parent-as in a parent worrying about their child being scared and offering lots of support, reinforces the fears of the worried child. Too much reassurance can ramp up the fear rather than a cheery "Have fun, see you later!" |
True.
I'm thinking our best tactic is to disappear the moment he's with the instructor. His mum might take some persuading on that point, though.
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@ChrisP71, I instruct kids at a dry slope - and yes, clear off straight away. Instructors really do not want parents nearby giving "support and encouragement", it distracts the kids, encourages them to look for sympathy rather than getting on with it. Kids are actually pretty determined and robust if parents give them the chance.
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But don't tell him an instructor will be physically holding on to him for the first few days. They won't!
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we have done a few trips up to Tamworth with our child for same reason.
It seems to be the only snow dome that offer lessons on a adhoc as opposed in the form of an after school club
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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@ChrisP71, don't rule out the idea of a dry slope, it'll still get him used to the gear, and used to the feel of sliding, without necessarily the added distraction of snow! If the instructor is any good there shouldn't be much falling over, they'll move the session on at the speed that keeps the lad confident, particularly if it's a private lesson.
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Skiing with other kids will most likely solve that. Parents are in fact asked by instructors to just step back and disappear - especially with younger beginners (my son was just 3 for his first time). Their progress is amazing!
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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We purposefully didn’t get Seagrave Jnr lessons in the UK before his first school ski trip (despite living in Milton Keynes), to avoid his building up preconceptions. I agree that the hands-off approach seems to work - kids are resilient and the instructors know how to goad/encourage them to get involved far better than we do!
Seagrave Jnr did his first school trip aged 3 and loved it. Great balance between lessons (couple of hours in the morning) and messing about (afternoon).
Essential to keep them warm and well-fed. +1 for regular hot chocolates.
Don’t be in too much of a rush.
LS
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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@ChrisP71, as an alternative idea, I think the fact that your little boy is petrified is totally reasonable and sensible. If you try and jolly him along in any way, he will (like all children) see straight through you and he will know that your real agenda is to get him to ski.
Maybe better to just acknowledge that sliding on snow is scary at first for everyone. And start out on flat areas and just have fun playing in the snow on skis and do pratfalls and make a fool of yourself and he will laugh and it will be relaxing and you will both have a good time. Whether or not you ski.
My kid is pretty good at seeing through any parenting technique I have attempted. I have just given up on trying to fool him, and now I just accept that some things are difficult and we do them anyway. For us, that’s worked to build up trust.
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You know it makes sense.
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alcohol.
Maybe a cherry brandy or some other winter warmer.
Call it superhero juice or something.
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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@ChrisP71, it depends how much of a shock it'll be for him. If you've taken him away with you when you've been skiing/boarding and he's been to nursery/creche then going to kiddy ski-school will be a natural progression for him. However, if he's never been on a mountain with skis on his feet then it can be daunting. Try to take him to some lessons locally just to get him used to getting skis & boots on and the feeling of sliding; it'll be a bonus if you can get to an indoor snow slope to get him used to the cold as much as anything. Adding some favourite snacks into a pocket will also help.
On one trip we went on, my son at 4.5yrs got out of a lift in a blizzard without batting an eyelid as we were happy and confident where the 7yr old daughter of friends we were with howled because she wasn't used to the weather and her mother was unhappy.
As always, it depends on the child and the parents...
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Poster: A snowHead
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My son used to be very anxious before group lessons on the first day, and didn’t want to go. I would follow them until I got caught up in a lift queue. But literally after 2 minutes he was fine, and loved it for the rest of the week.
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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Maybe worth to state a few points out load:
1) At 5, a ski school is a place where kids have fun together with cool gear, incidentally, they have skis.
2) This won't be YOUR best ski trip, except the 2 hours a day he's at the ski school, but you have to run.
Once you settle this in, nobody will be disappointed with the vacation
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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yvecai wrote: |
Maybe worth to state a few points out load:
1) At 5, a ski school is a place where kids have fun together with cool gear, incidentally, they have skis.
2) This won't be YOUR best ski trip, except the 2 hours a day he's at the ski school, but you have to run.
Once you settle this in, nobody will be disappointed with the vacation |
This does depend.... when ours were 4 & 1 we tried Esprit for the first time. That felt like the first proper holiday for me since we had children. We sued them for a number of good years. They aren’t the cheapest but they concentrated on make sure the kids had a great time, left us free to have a great time.
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
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well, he realized he's to young to become old. So no skis for now.
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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6 of my 7 grandchildren learnt to ski under my overall supervision/organisation, staying at our apartment. Some were more gung-ho than others, most had moments of apprehension, even if they didn't admit it (those people who insist that "kids have no fear" don't know many kids!). If a young child is anxious, arriving tired after a long day's travelling, into a strange environment, being thrown into a ski school the next morning, is really not a good idea. They might need time to just adapt, muck about in the snow, well wrapped up (all the kids I've known have loved this) before getting fitted for alien-robot ski boots and skis (and being told no, they CAN'T have poles, which are always immensely popular especially with boys). Having some lessons in a fridge beforehand makes sense. For small kids with competent, calm, parents, having a session on a really gentle slope, learning to glide (hands on knees) and get the idea of a snow plough can be good. You need a parent who skis backward in front of them holding ski tips (which is what a lot of instructors will do in a 1:1 private lesson with littlies). Trying to hold their hands alongside is fraught with difficulty and skiing with them between your legs tends to teach them to lean into you - which doesn't help.
Lots of people have already advised parents to get right out of the way once a child is with an instructor - whether individual or group. Absolutely right. Just clear off!
One of my grand-daughters had had a couple of lessons in the (very boring) nursery garden and her instructor, a woman I knew from previous grandkids, wanted to take her up the chairlift. But Lily was petrified of the chairlift and wept at the very thought. I worked on her the next evening, suggesting I go up with them and take a film of Lily skiing, and some photos, which she could show her teacher. She adored her teacher, and that did the trick. I went up with them, with two cameras - no gloves, no poles - and followed them down the very long, gentle, green run. It was a triumph. The instructor was skiing just behind her and watching carefully for any potential collisions from behind. Lily claimed later that "my instructor couldn't catch up with me" - and she was off. She remained a careful skier, never out of control, never trying anything too difficult- that's just her nature. I got very cold hands but it was worth it!
With other kids (especially, but not only, boys) you spend your time restraining them - insisting that they don't go off, ski under control, keep turning, etc etc This is a great benefit of the much-derided "ski school snake". Instructors won't let kids get out of control and ski beyond their ability, whereas you often see parents who can't ski much themselves taking kids on red runs which none of them can cope with safely.
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