 Poster: A snowHead
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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Goto go it alone buddy. 
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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kosciosco, get her some extra lessons now, hopefully if you do that then the two of you can ski together at least on most days
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kosciosco, Sometimes our zoological friend has the right idea. Speaking from experience, it can make domestic life a little tricky, though - unless Mrs k can go on a holiday she thoroughly enjoys doing without you. Good luck
PS just seen DG Orf's suggestion. Deffo worth a try before SZK's and mine.
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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Hook her up with a Ski Instructor stud 
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You'll need to Register first of course.
You'll need to Register first of course.
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yeh either a) confidence building, private / small grp. non esf lessons b) forget it and go away with the lads c) go somewhere special like Murren, Zermatt, Alpbach.. d) organise a big mixed crew so the whole thing is very social and a less about the skiing.
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kosciosco, If it is not that she absolutely hates it, but just that she doesn't feel very confident yet and doesn't like the idea of being left behind, or holding you up, I'd agree with D G Orf, see if she would be prepared to do a beginner's course at a dry ski slope.
I did an excellent course at Bowles near Tunbridge Wells over several weekends before the first time I went skiing, and I am so glad I did it - it really helped, the instructors were very friendly, and it meant that instead of thinking
"OMG  How will I ever stop, it's too steep!"
you think,
"OMG I daren't fall over, that dendrix will really hurt!"
It stops you falling over like magic!
In fact, at Bowles they have a separate beginners slope covered in a kind of white hard-wearing plastic carpet away from the main slope and you start on that. It is very user friendly and much kinder if you do fall over. Then you move to the main slope for later lessons.
I'm not sure about the geography of Bowles for you, there may be an equally good one closer, but definitely worth trying before you let her give up!
On the money issue, if you book really late you can get some amazing bargains. I booked for 6 of us last March and it was £359 per person in Les Arcs 2000 - catered chalet, wine, swimming pool (shared) - v nice! Bargain!
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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Ignore them kosciosco, you need to nurture her interest ..; mine was nurtured when I couldn't stand up for 3 days when I started ( and then they attached me to planks) .... my SO still puts up with my ineptitude and skis behind me during lessons ( only to disappear at speed if I hint i'm getting better) - and I'm extremely grateful ....; and unless you find a large group like PSB /EOSB you will still find a mismatch in ability levels so someone will be 'held up'. Family groups don't complain about ruined holidays ... The BOYS ONLY stuff only appears to be laddishness anyway and if you just want to go on the razz stay at home.
Ni if she's still 'interested' stick with her and help her .... then zhen shes better than you you won't feel so bad about yourself ;;; think this nice location stuff might help too !
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kosciosco, how about the eosb ? Plenty of people go on their own to that and it does ensure you get away !
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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Going to a resort with other activities isn't really a solution unless you're not going to ski all/every day as you'd still be doing separate things all day and only spending time together once the lifts close.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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I don't think it is unreasonable to ask her to give it one more try, given that you loved it so much. If she's prepared to go again encourage her to sign up with a good ski school/instructor, perhaps one that specialises in courses for women (eg Sally Chapman).
My partner likes skiing, although is happy to go just once a year. She knows that's not enough for me, so is happy to see me ski without her providing I don't go for more than a week at a time. Perhaps you could suggest that to your wife?
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You know it makes sense.
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kosciosco, worth one more try, in addition to the above, make blasted sure her gear (boots) really fits, then introduce her to the Apres Zone.
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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Poster: A snowHead
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| kosciosco wrote: |
| How do you deal with a wife ... |
Maybe the first thing is not to think of someone you love as someone you "deal with". Put her needs first ... and she will probably want you to enjoy your passions in return.
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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Russell, I agree, but wife No2 really enjoys her skiing, even though she ripped her ACL in two the last time we went.
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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Mix in some other activities with your ski holiday. While you are out developing your skills,,, send her shopping,, then buy her a day at the spa. Avoid any pressure for her to ski your slopes, and at your pace. When you do ski together, you have to ski in her comfort zone. Find her a ski lesson or two where she can enjoy some progress in developing her own skills, at her own pace. Oh yes,, and don't forget the fine dining experiences. And of course,, I know all of these suggestions cost $$$$$.
You have to decide if it is worth all the extra effort and cost. In my case,, I ski a lot, and my wife does not ski at all. She simply does not want too. And it would be a big waste to time, money and energy for me to try to force her too. So,, live and let live (ski).
good luck,,, skiing is all about balance,,, in more ways than one !!
Catmandu
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I had exactly the same situation with my ex-wife.
It really brought it home to me that you need a wife sho loves skiing at least as much as you do.
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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Mrs G likes to ski and is pretty handy too, for a girl  .
But she isn't as keen as me and could probably take it or leave it. So to ensure at least some snowtime I try,
a) A trip on my own, in return she goes on a summer jaunt with her mates.
b) A trip with wife and kids, usually with a group of others. Ski with Mrs on slopes she chooses most of time. Book her in for a couple of private lessons (and a couple for myself) to allow some time apart. Ski with kids most afternoons.
c) Long weekend away together - nice hotel, romantic etc. and again let her choose most of the skiing, but do encourage her to try new slopes/deeper snow/bumps, now and again.
Roberts' one of yer parents brother - best part of three weeks on the snow and happy families.
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You'll need to Register first of course.
You'll need to Register first of course.
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Private lessons while you have none - she'll soon catch up Is she nervous of the skiing or is it a general lack of interest in snowy destinations? Where did you go last time? What ski school setup? Pick somewhere that in all other respects is something she would pick (be in lovely chalet, 4* hotel, convienient for the slopes, good restuarants etc etc) and as someone else said make sure she likes the eqmpt, the outfit, everything.
Never ever utter the words "come on, you'll be fine" or "It's not that steep" or "But we came down here earlier and you were fine" while on the slopes, also be careful you are not sweeping her along, I took a friend a few years ago who seemed fine (confident beginner) but after half a day we stopped for lunch to be greeted with "Fitzwilliams! Everytime I catch sight of you you all bug off again!". We were having nice 5min breaks waiting for him, but of course he wasn't getting any rest at all!
Learning is tiring, especially if you are nervous - how about just doing half days some days and spending every other afternoon together?
hth, aj xx
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Rather extreme i know, but I divorced my wife in the end because we had NOTHING in common, including my love of jibbin!
Now hapily ensconsed with a fellow nutter jibber - the lovely Wendy, she's more crazy than me!
Going to Courch at crimbo and she's going on the big booters for the first time!!!! go girl!
A
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Above option too extreme.
I think worth trying to cultivate her interest by lessons as first attempt otherwise you are resigned to one week a year and will be made to feel guilty. It gets worse when you have kids. You also face argument had you spent time skiing with me I would be happy to go with you.
I reccomend moving up market with accomdation. Our 3 trips together were to average tour op chalets. A more upmarket option may make it more enjoyable place for R&R.
Final option is simply to be an uncaring so and so and go without her. I've done that for my last 3 trips
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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kosciosco, I recomend her trying short skis or blades. Learning speeds are much quicker and her confidence will advanced rapidly.
Suggest to her to give them a try before she gives up completely.
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It is great,, if your partner and yourself can enjoy skiing together. But it is not the end of the world if one spouse is not a skier. I also enjoy skiing with my kids, friends,, and just about anyone for that matter. My wife is quite happy to make the hot chocolate,, and add the Bailey's, when the ski day is done.
BTW,, can anyone name me the 5 planes of balance, in skiing ?? Care to try for 6 ??
Catmandu
Last edited by Ski the Net with snowHeads  on Tue 29-08-06 17:23; edited 1 time in total
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
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kosciosco, Do other stuff in resort, go for a massage, to a spa, eating out etc. Takes the focus off the skiing a little. 
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
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Posted this on a similar thread back in March, might be relevant:
With apologies to Mrs Axs (who hopefully wont mind me telling her story), she was a classic ‘anti’ as the result of a bad experience.
In her early twenties (we are both now late forties!) she went with some ‘friends’ on a ski trip to Mayrhoffen. There she spent a week on 1.9m straight skis going back and fourth on a flat nursery slope. She never even got to ride a chairlift! Basically there was a huge language barrier, and she had a miserable time. This coupled with her fear of heights (and terror on chairlifts) meant that she was never tempted to try again.
When we met (6 years ago) I had only skied a couple of times and could barely parallel turn, but had really enjoyed the experience. We got to talking and with some trepidation she agreed to give it another try to see how she got on.
We booked a 1 day course at the Leeds Xscape and from the beginning, the friendly patient instruction won her over. It probably helped that an indoor slope really doesn’t look very ‘high’! At the end of the day she was managing to snow-plough down ‘from the top’ and was enthusiastic enough to book a trip to Italy with me. We bought her boots at Leeds and she made a point of wearing them for an hour a day or so round the house to bed them in.
In italy (Aosta/Pila) we booked four days of private lessons (2hrs) from Interski and although she did have a few ‘wobbles’ we both gained confidence enough to handle blues and start to think about reds.
One setback came when we took the kids away for a week (again to Pila) and ‘trusted’ their judgement ‘Oh we just did this run and it was easy, honest’ – Kids have NO fear! A somewhat tearful walk off the piste later, Mrs Axs took a bit of persuading that she’d ever be able to cope, but fortunately she recovered.
More trips, more private lessons, more confidence. Occasional tumbles, but no injuries, no more panics, and steady improvement.
This year we have skied at Val D’isere and Alpe D’huez, and next month we’re off to Heavenly. We are both hooked, and can’t be bothered with ‘lazy’ booze-filled beach holidays any more. We recognise the importance of fitness, and are both walking (about 5 miles a day) to build stronger legs. Mrs Axs is over her fear of lifts (but she does sometime close her eyes!) and at Val we did our first black run together. Neither of us thinks we’ll ever be great, but good enough to enjoy the mountain is all we need.
Moral of the tale for me? Well with a bit of encouragement, a lot of patience, a few hundred quids worth of PRIVATE lessons from good instructors and quite a bit of courage, even the most nervous pedestrian can learn to ski and more importantly, grow to love it. ‘where there’s a will’ and all that…. Oh and comfortable, properly fitted boots are worth every penny.
UPDATE: Heavenly Lake Tahoe was amazing pix here:
http://snowheads.com/ski-forum/viewtopic.php?t=15001&highlight=
Mrs Axs is now as addicted as me and we are planning three trips this season, already booked for Easter with the kids in Les Arcs. Result!
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You know it makes sense.
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T Bar, Which half of Richard and Judy are you? 
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Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
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kosciosco, Lessons at Bowles, and then lessons on the snow - with Easiski ?
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Poster: A snowHead
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SMALLZOOKEEPER,
I have no problems with my feminine side me. 
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Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
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kosciosco, How about a few lessons at MK as assume you are not to far from there. They might also have some sort of Ladies morning/club.
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Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
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On top of all of the above suggestion I would try to ski at sunny time of the season, whilst making sure that she is as comfortable as possible (clothes, boots, accommodation etc).
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You need to Login to know who's really who.
You need to Login to know who's really who.
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I tell her to stop being such a wuss and to get out on the slopes pronto. Fortunately she is not MY wife.
Good lessons are the key as said above.
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
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You'll need to Register first of course.
You'll need to Register first of course.
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kosciosco,I second lessons with Easkiski, or come to Serre Chevalier and book her some lessons with Eurekaski. If, at the end of the week, she still hates it, and can't ski a blue, then you' may stop asking her to go skiing again. The village is pretty, the nursery slopes are at the bottom of the lifts, and she will be up the mountain in no time at all. March is a good time to go, the weather is usually warmer, and the days longer. MK do have a ladies morning, I think there's a thread somewhere., but I can't find it.
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kosciosco, My other half & I started together about 10 years ago - he progressed really quickly, & I had a fall on my last day & tore the posterior capsules of both my knees! So, not a good introduction. I lost all my confidance, while he loved it & was keen to go again. A couple of times he took the kids & i was fine with that, but about 6 years ago I was press-ganged into going again. I joined a group lesson in the mornings & hated it! Met them all for lunch & would then go back by myself - the problem was, I knew I would hold them back & slow them down, although they were always very patient with me. I was on the verge of giving up, when my husband & brother decided one night over a few bottles of wine, to buy an appartment in the alps. Since going there & getting really familiar with the slopes, I now just love it! At first I had several private lessons (too nervous to make good use of a group lesson), & now I happily do reds, & ski 4 weeks a year.
So, to sum up - perservere, but gently. Let her go at her own pace, & get her a few private lessons with a really good/sympathetic instructor.
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
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And all those people who laughed at my "Skiing companion" thread will now perhaps realise that it wasn't such a bad idea, of course it would have helped if I wasn't overweight and maybe looked like Prad Pitt or Gearge Cloony
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Divorce seems the only option to be, cite irreconcilable differences, im sure you must be able to do it onlne by now. Whilst youre on the net book yourself a ski trip and buy a cheap 21yrs old 6ft blonde babe from Russia/ Latvia/ other eastern hole and voila- ski trip ahoy!
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FAQ
and that we'll have some holidays apart! You just need to make sure that she gets to choose the summer holiday 
so I don't know what we'll do next year.
