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Chalet stereotypes

 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
The “pretty much full time vegan” who moans about there being very few options but by Sunday evening is a full on carnivore and loving the meat courses. Suddenly remembers on the Friday before it’s home time....
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
I've never done a chalet holiday but by the sounds of it, a lot of you would chose it over a nice self catering apartment.
I'm a very sociable person but when I'm knackered I just want to do my own thing
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
@sbooker, these days you don’t share bathrooms. My first ski holidays were chalet holidays...about 20 of us in a big gang. They were huge huge fun-like a big house party.
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“The wannabe - the desk jockey with the avy pack and the bizarre unnecessarily fat skis“

Also a very common site on Bashes Embarassed

Edit: can’t believe I spelt sight wrong, guess that’s a lesson not to post when I’ve only just woken up.


Last edited by You need to Login to know who's really who. on Fri 27-07-18 10:53; edited 1 time in total
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
We always do chalet holidays and I've never had a bad one. Maybe it's just luck - don't recognise most of these stereotypes, although we normally end up in places that are full of couples rather than families.

That said, given that "if you cant spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you are the sucker" I do wonder what people think of us... I normally just tell the same stories when well into the second bottle of red...
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Funniest thread I've read in ages (miles better than anything I'm currently supposed to be reading at work..). Thanks Madeye-Smiley
Speaking from the perspective of the only normal person in the chalet (given the above, there's not much room left for the likes of us...) I note that at least some of them seem to appear in summer in mountain refuges and out of season ski hotels ..doing the same stuff only with shorts on Toofy Grin
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Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Hey, just imagine if we were all 'normal' !
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
The "professional-one-upmanship", actually stayed in a chalet once with a GP, a JP, and an MP in St Anton!

Notwithstanding the "I-got-the-longest-skis" in the ski/boot room chappy who bemoans the "mini-skis" of today.

And ………. the "trophy-ski-wife" complete with Strolz boots, Moncler and Kjus ski outfits, latest Kastle/Zai/Lacroix limited edition skis, Snakeskin helmet with integrated whatever the weather visors, cashmere ski polos, who drinks only Krystal Aperol Spritz. (Mrs Skimastaaah!!)
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@suec,...............and saying "when i'm here in winter for the season and straight lining those couloirs over there.....blah blah" Laughing

Quote:

I note that at least some of them seem to appear in summer in mountain refuges and out of season ski hotels ..doing the same stuff only with shorts on


......and skateboards wink
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@Dave of the Marmottes, Agreed with the above, funny thread this one......well done!

We seem to have missed out the "when i'm crewing yachts in the med in the summer for filthy rich oligarchs and fighting off the admirers, beardy/ straggly blond hair with beads everywhere type", surely we've met these guys? I certainly have......they can normally ski/ board pretty well too, having spent all their youth in 3V and Val with mummy and pa since the age of -9 months to Uni.
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snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
@skimastaaah,
Quote:

And ………. the "trophy-ski-wife" complete with Strolz boots, Moncler and Kjus ski outfits, latest Kastle/Zai/Lacroix limited edition skis, Snakeskin helmet with integrated whatever the weather visors, cashmere ski polos, who drinks only Krystal Aperol Spritz. (Mrs Skimastaaah!!)

No Bogner...? wink
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 And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
@Markymark29, … Bogner is so, soo passee! Even TK Maxx has it!
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 So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
@skimastaaah, and all the chavs in our cities have Monclerr (not Moncler)......don't forget the Canadien Goose too (not to be confused with Canadian Goose) wink Laughing
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 You know it makes sense.
You know it makes sense.
What about the small group, usually 3 - 5 travelling together who rush in just as tea is ending and the chalet staff are clearing up to set the table for dinner and they (the guests) demand tea and then loudly regale anyone who cannot escape them or their loud voices about the amaaaazing powder snow they found off piste in a number of little known couloirs and what great skiing they had when the resort has had no snow for several weeks, the sun is not hot enough to soften the surface of the rapidly reducing snow depth so most of the day is spent skiing icey rocky runs and the off piste is pretty much unskiable having (a) been skiied out a couple of weeks earlier (b) getting dangerous due to avalanche risk and (c) the rocks and roots and coming through. But Nooooo they have had just the best days skiing of their lives werent they just the luckiest people alive?
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 Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
@Markymark29, every one knows the city chavs cannot afford the real thing. Most of them can't afford the fakes either.
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 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
I can recognise myself in many of these so far, so I have to add in:

The GoPro Hero hero, who can’t resist any opportunity to show hours of his (or her) exploits for the day. Pre editing of course. Lots of ‘oh there’s a good bit coming up in a minute, just hang on, once I’ve got onto that chairlift you can see down there and skied round the corner from the top we’ll be there’

The rich tapestry of people is part of what can make the occasional chalet holiday fun. Despite my naturally intolerant nature, I can see the humourous and interesting side of most people for a few days.
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@sbooker, some European countries have far more British run chalets than others.
From my experience, France has most. Areas such as 3 Valleys, Espace Killy, Paradiski have a good proportion of chalets.

Switzerland has fewer but still a decent number, especially in Verbier and villages linked to PDS area.

Austria tends more towards guest houses and hotels, though some larger areas have quite a few chalets, such as Arlberg and Saalbach-Hinterglemm. Italy has fewest chalets amongst the big European ski countries.

All above are subjective and generalisations. Some hotels are competing by throwing in afternoon tea/cake and free wine with dinner, to compete.

Perhaps the biggest difference between a chalet and hotel is the diversity of nationalities. Obviously chalets get mostly British people. Resort hotels a wider range.

Even then there are exceptions. For example, I shared a Val D chalet with 2 other Brits and 10 Belgians and everyone had a great time.
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
@FFIRMIN, it is entirely possible to find transformed soft snow weeks after a snowfall if it’s been clear skies and cold.

And if everyone else thinks the h.p. Is skied out...

Been there, done that...
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We do chalet breaks a fair bit these days after many years (decades?) of doing our own thing.

I think it was because nobody could be bothered cooking etc as we got a bit older - the attraction of someone else organising food and some wine before we head to the pub.

Our group of late 40s / 50s guys are all pretty decent skiers and boarders and try to mix with whatever the company is.

Recognise the stereotypes well on this thread Toofy Grin and we always wonder what we are getting if we have a group sat next to us.

Being honest, most people are usually decent and the only ones that grind the gears are the "I am better than you / been more places / got more gear / just an all round magic skiier" types.......

The other thing that gets on my thruppenies is one of the "all the gear" types asking me why I dont wear a helmet - they are usually marked as a funny fellow immediately.

That and the "whatever I say must be heard by the entire room at 120 decibels and in a braying entitled accent" types.

Mind you, as we all think we are still 25 and meet up with friends who live in the mountains when away, they probably all look at us and say - "those Scottish guys always look a bit rough in the morning, bunch of alkie" and they could be right !!Very Happy
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Bigtipper wrote:
@sbooker, it is pot luck depending on where you book and when. Although by choosing the where and when, you are likely to narrow the type.



Though to be fair you can get all of them and turned up to 11 on a sH's bash.
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Youth hostels are not chalets, and they attract a different clientele (even though they can be fully catered in ski resorts - so in some ways similar to a chalet).

The main difference to a chalet is that people tend to behave with respect towards

a) the staff
b) fellow travellers
c) the furniture

I think the difference is due to the normal hostel requirement to be sober, wash and clean your dishes as well as sometimes other peoples dishes when there are rotas, do some cleaning in some hostels. Due to the lower prices, people tend not to advertise loudly how big their car is or what property markets are doing. Meal times tend to be moderate (perhaps that is my impression of Swiss hostels rather than elsewhere, although I have stayed in hostels in USA, Canada , Fiji, NZ, Australia, Scotland, England as well as Switzerland)

There are solos in youth hostels, as well as young children. There tends not to be whole families, although that is also unlikely in a chalet.

People tend to respect these rules in a hostel, as the membership means that you can gain a reputation (where memberships are normal). Particularly good is the lack of snorers in communal dorms. Snorers tend to avoid communal dorms. Also, alcohol tends to make most people snore.

Many of the chalet types are not encountered in hostels. However, the type that hostels attract can also be annoying to chalet types. Best that they remain separate....
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Hmm one of the best drunken carousing nights I've ever had was Hogmany at Glen Nevis YH. The warden specifically took it upon himself to ensure that no one snuck off to town for more action. Those of us with cars were sent on booze runs and a great Ceiladh was thrown
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
Quote:

these days you don’t share bathrooms

Well probably not sharing the bathroom, but certainly when I last did a chalet holidayin 2017 you took turns in the bathroom
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johnE wrote:
Quote:

these days you don’t share bathrooms

Well probably not sharing the bathroom, but certainly when I last did a chalet holidayin 2017 you took turns in the bathroom


Many are ensuite these days. Not all though.
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Dave of the Marmottes wrote:
Though to be fair you can get all of them and turned up to 11 on a sH's bash.

And all in the same apartment if you’re (un)lucky Shocked Toofy Grin
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Bigtipper wrote:

The main difference to a chalet is that people tend to behave with respect towards

a) the staff
b) fellow travellers
c) the furniture


So people who stay in chalets on holiday typically disrespect the staff, fellow travellers and furniture?

I've been joined in chalets by a large amount of dickheads, but none of them were directly disrespectful to anyone or anything, they just had very poor personalities with often some sociopolitical attitudes which are quite difficult for civilised people to get on board with.

I think your comment there comes somewhere between "massive generalisation from a tiny minority" and "total BS"; and even with my dislike of the chalet crowd I'd say it's on the "total BS" end of that scale.
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And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
Well I thought it was funny, although when I have stayed in such places (not for quite a while) I only remember meeting interesting people. Maybe I was the stereotype and they were all nice.

I do tend to be the solo traveller with my nose in a book, so perhaps that's another one you could add. Not impolite, but with a "leave me alone" attitude which generally works. I'm the person who doesn't really want to hear your life story.

I was thinking, maybe the trick is to avoid places where alcohol is free and supplied without limit?
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So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
philwig wrote:

I was thinking, maybe the trick is to avoid places where alcohol is free and supplied without limit?


Or maybe to seek them out Razz Razz
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 You know it makes sense.
You know it makes sense.
@martinm, +1 Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
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 Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Avoid chalet holidays although used to go with lads back in the day. Self cater and arrange now but I'm definately military dad at least until the kids are dropped off at ski school; it's like herding cats.

Chatting in the apartment blocks or with other ski school parents though has always been pleasant and only met nice people even if our chats have only been pass the day level at the bottom of the comms triangle.
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Poster: A snowHead
As an avid people and life watcher, chalet holidays are great fun.

Just sit wand watch, listen, smile, nod etc. Very relaxing
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Dave of the Marmottes wrote:
......what other setereotypes are there:


The Helmet Evangelist
Mr Airbag
Mr Custom Boots Agony
The Depressed Au Pair

And they are just members of my own family. Single room in a proper hotel, bliss.
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
@Pruman, Laughing
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There's always someone who is sick, bunged up with cold, snivelling, coughing and spluttering away, possibly with D&V too for good measure, who instead of quarantining themselves in some sort of sensible manner, eagerly insists on spluttering through every mealtime and social moment in the chalet, cranking every radiator up max, lighting the fire and turning the entire chalet into a huge sauna type germ incubator. By day 3 everyone has the flu or diarrorhea and vommiting.

Not sure what you'd call them ?
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Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
The Plague Mary?
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There's also always the "Double Dipper" during hors d'oeuvres !
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The boarding school parents - whose multiple children got packed off to a hugely over priced boarding school as soon as they were old enough, during that time the parent forgot how to actually parent so lets their little beast have everything it wants because they never learned that saying 'no' to it won't hurt it in the slightest, even when little Tarquin makes a hot chocolate for himself consisting of 15 scoops of chocolate powder and 21 spoons of sugar just before bed, then whinges and whines all day their little darling didn't sleep very well, is having a tantrum that could literally end the world and is bribed with chocolate to behave himself and go skiing today 'like a good boy'. Whilst dad is on a business call to Singapore even when it's 3 am over there, and spends the entire time looking at his wife with an expression of 'when will this fresh hell ever end?'
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
@Pruman, +1
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The selfish, opinionated Guardianistas, who hate democracy, hate their country and hate anybody who scrimped and saved to send their children to an independent school precisely so that they weren't taught by chippy lefties...

Or am I being a tad controversial?.
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Nope mitcva not a tad wink
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